This is perhaps not the most surprising news but, according to a new study, most Americans are unhappy at work.

A recent Gallup study found that 52 percent of American employees felt like they were “not engaged” at their job and were just going through the motions without any sort of energy or passion. Another 18 percent said they were “actively disengaged,” which means that, in addition to not giving a shit about their job, they are also acting “out their unhappiness by undermining what their engaged coworkers accomplish.”

Only 30 percent of workers surveyed said they were regularly engaged or inspired by their jobs.

And worker morale is something that cannot be bought, despite the best efforts of certain tech companies: the study found that expensive in-office perks for workers, like catered meals and ping pong tables, had little to no effect on employee's satisfaction with their jobs.

Of course, all of this complaining about life at work, while maybe understandable, pales in comparison to complaints of those without jobs at all.

[Image via Shutterstock]

The presidential palace in Kabul, Afghanistan was attacked early Tuesday morning. Gunfire and several large explosions were reported at the palace and the buildings surrounding it, including the CIA's Afghan headquarters. The Taliban texted reporters, many of whom were at the palace already, to claim responsibility.

Looks like all of those apology videos didn't work: On Monday, Smithfield Foods, the world's largest pork producer, ended their business relationship with Paula Deen. If the makers of various spiral hams have lost faith in her, it can't be too much longer until her remaining sponsors, including Wal-Mart, follow suit.

The criminal justice system in the state of California is operating perfectly, excepting the small matter of the looming and inevitable infectious disease race war.

Yesterday, the AP reports, a District Judge gave the state of California 90 days to evacuate more than 3,000 inmates from two state prisons, both of which are riddled with infectious disease. Ho hum.

Evacuees will include most of their black, Filipino and medically at-risk inmates because they are considered the most vulnerable to health problems from the fungus, commonly called valley fever.

[California Corrections Secretary Jeffrey] Beard told The Associated Press that moving those inmates to other prisons could upset carefully set racial balances and exacerbate gang violence.

Oh well they die either way so who cares. USA.

[AP. Photo: AP]

A bunch of awful xenophobes in Dalton Gardens, Idaho have banded together to sell bullets wrapped in a unique porcine coating. The goal here is for the ammunition to strike fear into the hearts of Muslims who abstain from pork. The company is called "Jihawg Ammo." The tag line: "Put some HAM in Mohamed." For fuck's sake.

Because people who set up stupid and hateful stunts like this are always cowardly, the team behind Jihawg wouldn't give their names or a statement to the Huffington Post, nor have they responded to a request for comment from Gawker. As a result, all we know about Jihawg is what can be gleaned from its website's "About" section, which reads like a Stormfront message board parody (emphasis ours):

In the fall of 2010, patriots from Idaho County, Idaho sat around a campfire enjoying an adult beverage. The discussion turned to concern and disgust that a mosque was being built at ground zero. Everyone in attendance agreed that freedom of religion is paramount for all peoples of Earth but this showed poor taste and had a sense of "rubbing our noses" into 9/11 tragedy. The discussion turned toward possible solutions to stop such a great insult.

History of dealings with radical Islam from the days of Jefferson and the Barbary Pirates to actions of Gen. John J. "Black Jack" Pershing in the early 1900’s in the Philippines gave clarity to a modern day market solution-Jihawg Ammo. Our preference is peace first but if a fight is to be had we are determined and resolved to win. Thus came the beginning of the truest form of defensive ammunition ever created in history.

A natural deterrent that prevents violence just by owning it but will strike fear into the hearts of those bent upon hate, violence and murder. Jihawg Ammo is certified "Haraam" or unclean. According to the belief system of the radical Islamist becoming "unclean" during Jihad will prevent their attaining entrance into heaven. Jihawg Ammo is a natural deterrent to radical and suicidal acts of violence.

Jihawg says its product's porcine coating is "pattern pending," but the U.S. Patent Office doesn't have any applications containing the word "Jihawg," nor is there any bullet applications pending in Dalton Gardens, Idaho. There is, however, an application form from an Arizona man named Mark Price, whose "suicide bomb deterrent" idea is a packet of pig blood affixed to public walls. In theory, the blood packet would explode in event of a suicide bomb, mixing the bomber's blood with that of the pig, and denying him from heaven.

In fact, Price's pig blood architectural device isn't the only product that's attempted to capitalize on the Muslim distaste for pork the way a vampire hunter might use garlic. In the '90s, Israeli rabbi and chemist Moshe Antelman developed a bullet containing pig fat to use against his nation's Islamic enemies. Even before that there were early 20th Century reports of armies, faced with Muslim enemies, wrapping their dead foes in pig skins in order to taint them for their god.

Unfortunately for enemies of Islam, religious scholars say myths of pork bullets and death shrouds ruining the afterlife for Muslims are greatly overblown. Shannon Dunn, assistant professor of religious studies at Gonzaga University, told the Huffingon Post that there "is no penalty for coming into contact with pork given by the Quran."

"To my knowledge, Muslims, especially unknowingly, would not be banned from heaven for eating or getting hit by pork,” she said. “There are some interpreters who suggest that Muslims should eat pork rather than starve, if faced with that alternative.”

Alas, sometimes there's no arguing with hate: You can now buy 50 rounds of Jihawg 9mm ammo for the low price of $24.75.

[Photo from Facebook]

Is the shape of your face ruining your chances of finding life-long love and therefore happiness and a satisfactory life? Some British scientists found that the shapes of women's heads are correlated to whether men consider them desirable for short or long-term relationships.

The study's participants were shown two composite versions of faces—one with more feminine or delicate features, the other with stronger, more masculine features. Feminine qualities include features like smaller jawlines or fuller cheeks. These features are usually associated with higher lever of estrogen as well as reproductive success.

The several hundred heterosexual men who participated in the study were more interested in women with "feminine" features for short-term flings, and women with "masculine" features for marriage or long-term relationships.

According to the study's authors, men "may actually prefer less attractive/feminine women" as long-term partners, because they say this might boost confidence regarding fidelity. People have also made this argument about women.

These researchers from University of Stirling and University of Glasgow, who presumably ran out of other things to study, published their work in the British Journal of Psychology.

[image via Jul Bezuglova/Shutterstock]

At a recent Q&A for his latest cinematic contribution Unfinished Song, veteran thespian Terence Stamp, best known to Superman fans as both the original General Zod and, later, the voice of Jor-El in TV's Smallville, recounted an amazing story about a restroom encounter he had just had with a group of moviegoers grumbling about the quality of the new Superman film compared to the original film series.

Courtesy of The Hollywood Reporter, whose staff writer Scott Feinberg moderated the event:

I spent an hour and a half driving down here from Ojai, and the first thing I wanted to do when I got out was take a leak. I go into the men's bathroom and there's a whole load of guys — obviously, Man of Steel [the Superman reboot] had just turned out. So I take a pee, and I start washing my hands, and there's about 10 or 12 guys there, and they're talking about Man of Steel. And one says, 'Well, I don't know. If they'd have, like, peeled the buildings off the screen I wouldn't have been surprised, you know?' Another says, 'It was all so loud.' Then the guy down at the other end, who was only a little guy, said, 'Yeah, yeah!' And he said, 'It really wasn't as good as the first one, was it?' And I just couldn't resist, and I said, 'You're a very discerning man.' And as soon as they heard the voice they said, [screaming in shock] 'Oh my God! It's General Zod!' I swear to God, it just happened!

Sadly, Stamp passed up a once-in-a-lifetime to order the men to "pee before Zod."

The 74-year-old actor previously called Superman I and II "the very best of all those comic book movies," and said he didn't know if he would see the new film.

"I'm sure it's bigger and better and louder, but I'll be amazed if it has the same kind of ironic humor," he told the Post's Page Six.

[photos via AP]

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Last night, CBS premiered its TV series adaptation of Stephen King's 2009 novel Under the Dome to gigantic ratings. So far it's about a mysterious dome that people find themselves mysteriously under. Some of these people are nice people and some are not nice people. It's kind of like The Simpsons Movie, but with more cow carcass.

The dome is something like electrified, and really the most enjoyable thing about the first episode was watching people react to its power and danger. I could watch the guy attempting to rush another guy and getting knocked down by the dome over and over and over again. Real menacing, that dome. All still and invisible and shit.

Warning: The video above contains some gore (more than what you usually see on network TV). Like I said: cow carcass.

On Tuesday, Kim Kardashian, Mother of the Great Unknowable North, got a handful of random babies wasted off the exotic elixir of fame when she allegedly sent their pictures out to a half-dozen friends, and said they were photos of her kid.

In a story titled "KIM KARDASHIAN BOGUS BABY!" TMZ reported that Kardashian intended to use the images to separate friends from fiends; if outlets began publishing the photos, she would know that someone in her circle had leaked them. It's an old celebrity trick. Andy Warhol used to do it. Always sending texts like out like "This is Kim and Kanye's baby DO NOT TWEET," to put his so-called friends on blast.

TMZ wrote that someone did attempt to sell them one of the shots: a little baby with a face like Kim and Kanye's baby might have, wearing a little white hat like Kim and Kanye's baby might wear. They also published a second fake photo, this one of an infant all swaddled in a fuzzy baby blanket. It's not clear how TMZ got these photos if they didn't pay for them. Did Kim forward TMZ the pictures herself (subj: EXCLUSIVE PHOTOS NOT OF MY BABY) and ask for their cooperation in Operation: Abandon Friend-Ship?

In any event, the real question here: Who are these déclassé‎ babies? How did Kim Kardashian acquire these cell phone photos of them? Did Kanye creep up to the nursery and surreptitiously snap photos of any baby that did not have a visible penis? Did he mill about the halls of the Cedars-Sinai maternity ward offering new dads $10,000 for their SIM cards? Did Kim Google Image search "unfamous baby" and when Google suggested "infamous baby" was she like "NO, OPPOSITE OF THAT!"? Does it really matter if these babies aren't North Kardashian, since all newborns look virtually identical and any baby can be North Kardashian if you squint hard enough?

What's your story, babies?

[Image via Getty]

To contact the author of this post, email caity@gawker.com.

Some good news for a family in Michigan who, after a battle with the state's Department of Natural Resources, will be able to keep their pet deer, which they rescued five years ago.

The family rescued and adopted the deer shortly after its mother was hit by a car outside the family's home. Immediately after being hit, the deer went into labor and delivered twins, only one of whom survived. The family asked the police officer on the scene if they could keep the baby deer to nurse it back to health. "Go ahead. She won't last 15 minutes but give it a try,” he responded.

The rehabilitation worked, and the deer, which they named Lilly, became part of their family. Lilly reportedly enjoys playing frisbee and watching Animal Planet, and she sleeps on a futon inside the house next to the family's cats. Sure.

But when word got around to Michigan's Department of Natural Resources, because of the snitching friend of a neighbor, reportedly, the family found themselves in legal trouble; the state organization ordered the family to give up the deer because they were not licensed wildlife rehabilitators.

The family said that would be like “losing a child” and told the Daily Mail that Lilly would be “heartbroken” if she were taken away from them. “We're all she's ever known."

Thankfully, after a minor media uproar and an online petition that gathered over 10,000 signatures, the family reached an agreement with the department.

“Lilly’s caretakers have applied for an Exhibition Class Permit and they will continue to provide Lilly with the love, care, and environment she needs to thrive,” their lawyer told ABC News. The family also agreed to put a suitable fence around their yard and to test Lily annually for various diseases.

The family, who didn't want to be indentified, released a statement after the agreement was reached:

As you can imagine the last several weeks have been an emotional roller coaster for us and now that the agreement has been signed we would like to recapture the regular routine of our lives.

Hopefully, that plan includes helping other deer in need. They could start with this guy.

[ABC News/Image via LillytheDeer]

To contact the author of this post, email taylor@gawker.com

Here's a crazy idea: A Michigan man convicted of having a large quantity of pot—a plant that everyone smokes to get a little high now and again—was recently given probation by a judge who thought it stupid to send a guy to jail for years just because he got busted growing weed. Wow. Can America survive this kind of insanely rational justice?

The Associated Press reports that U.S. District Judge Bernard Friedman showed great leniency to Edwin Schmieding today, sentencing Schmieding to no jail and just two years of probation after the 61-year-old was caught with 8,000 marijuana plants on his farm in 2011. Schmieding and his wife had been hoping to get involved with Michigan's legal medical marijuana trade, although growing that large of a crop is highly prohibited.

Schmieding, who is recovering from throat cancer, received support throughout his trial from friends and relatives who sent letters vouching for his kindness and generosity to Judge Friedman. "This is one that most screams out: This man deserves a break," Friedman said in court today.

Wonderful. And surely exactly how this all would have played out if Schmieding had been a 19-year-old black kid instead of a middle-aged white guy. Ha ha ha. But seriously this is pretty good.

[Image via AP]

Two years after he resigned from Congress for sending pictures of his penis to random women on Twitter, Anthony Weiner is now the front runner in the Democratic primary race to become the next mayor of New York City.

Democratic Rep. Edward Markey defeated Republican candidate Gabriel Gomez in the special election in Massachusetts for John Kerry's vacated Senate seat.

Shortly after 10 PM CDT, Texas State Senator Wendy Davis, in hour 11 of her historic filibuster to prevent an anti-abortion bill from passing, received her third point of order or warning, effectively meaning that the filibuster was over. Except it wasn't. The crowd erupted in protest and Senators have spent the past 40 minutes or so debating whether the point of order violated the Senate's rules. Watch live below:

And here's video of protesters shouting out after the third point of order was declared:

The Texas Tribune has a liveblog of the proceedings. We'll update once we know more.

UPDATE 1:18 AM: Both the Associated Press and CBS News are saying that Republicans passed the bill, but based on the live video, there's been no such official confirmation yet.

UPDATE: 1:26 AM: Here's the scene inside the Capitol's rotunda just before midnight:

UPDATE 1:31 AM: Video of Texas State Senator Leticia Van de Putte asking, "At what point must a female Senator raise her hand or her voice to be recognized over her male colleagues in the room?"

Van de Putte's question was followed by roughly 15 minutes of shouting and applause from spectators and protesters.

UPDATE 1:47 AM: The live stream for the Texas State Senate just ended. There's still confusion about the bill and whether it was voted on before the midnight deadline. There have also been reports of protesters being arrested. Here's a live stream from inside the Capitol's rotunda.

UPDATE 2:01 AM: From the Texas Tribune live blog:

Senate just ordered senators back for a caucus to determine whether they passes SB5. Just when you thought it couldn't get stranger. #txlege

— Statesmanmike (@mikestatesman) June 26, 2013

UPDATE 2:50 AM: The Texas Senate live stream is back online.

UPDATE 3:20 AM: There are now reports that SB 5 did not pass.

Cecile Richards just told Capitol rotunda activists #sb5 is dead. Cheers. Crying. Hugs. #txlege

— Aman Batheja (@amanbatheja) June 26, 2013

[Image via AP]

Tax-evading financier Marc Rich, pardoned by President Clinton on his last day in office for some funny business about illegally selling Iranian oil while the country held Americans hostage, has died in Switzerland.

After 13 hours, three warnings, a long debate about parliamentary procedure and hundreds of thousands of messages from supporters, Wendy Davis can finally sit down: SB5, the "toughest" abortion bill in the nation, is dead.

Davis, a Democratic Texas State Senator (once called a "show horse" by Rick Perry) took to the floor around 11 a.m. yesterday in an attempt to filibuster the draconian bill, which Republicans were attempting to ram through in a sneaky special session of the legislature called by Gov. Rick Perry. The bill would criminalize abortions after the 20th week of pregnancy and enact a series of severe restrictions on doctors to provide care, leaving Texas—the nation's second-largest state—with only five abortion providers.

These were the rules: Davis—who had her first daughter at 19, graduated at the top of her class at Texas Christian University, and went on to Harvard Law—couldn't take a break, for water or for the bathroom. She couldn't receive assistance, or even lean on an object for support. She had to stay on topics germane to the bill. And she had to last until midnight, at which point the special session would end without a vote.

So, fast-forward 15-ish hours. Here's Planned Parenthood's Cecile Richards in the lobby of the legislature, talking to the hundreds of abortion-rights supporters who had gathered there over the course of the day:

If you can't tell from those cheers: Wendy won. It just took a while.

Davis was cited under the filibuster's "three strikes" procedural rules twice for straying from the topic at hand (she wasn't: She was talking about Planned Parenthood and sonograms), and once for receiving minor assistance from a fellow Democratic Senator in putting her back brace on. At around 10 p.m. her time, following her "third strike," Republicans attempted to shut the filibuster down—leading to chants of "let her speak" from the protestors outside:

Luckily, the Democratic senators banded together, and launched a two-hour debate on parliamentary procedure, highlighted by Texas State Senator Leticia Van de Putte asking, "At what point must a female Senator raise her hand or her voice to be recognized over her male colleagues in the room?"

A vote was eventually held; the bill passed. But—as it came out eventually—the vote was held after midnight, when the session was over. David Dewhurst, Texas' Lt. Gov., declared at 3 a.m. that the bill would not be enrolled, thanks to "[a]n unruly mob using Occupy Wall Street tactics." And show horse Wendy Davis, still wearing her pink sneakers, got to sit down.

Virginia Governor McDonnell received a Rolex from a prominent political donor and failed to disclose the wrist-watch in his financial reports, as is habit with the absent-minded, timepiece-wearing politician.

The $6,500 bundle of cogs was given to the Governor by Jonnie R. Williams Sr., the wealthy chief executive of the dietary supplements manufacturer Star Scientific. Williams also funded the catering at the Governor's daughter's wedding. Presumably they did not eat dietary supplements. Since serving as Governor starting in 2010, McDonnell has said that he has received $9,650 in personal gifts from Williams and Star Scientific, though state records indicate that the actual number is $108,452.

Williams gave McDonnell the time-telling wristlet in August 2011, which the Washington Post reports was just two weeks after Williams met with a prominent state health official to discuss the benefits of Star Scientific's products and a few weeks before the McDonnells hosted Star Scientific at the Governor's mansion for the formal launch of Anatabloc. The Governor's wife, Maureen McDonnell, organized the initial meeting. Just moments before the meeting began, Mrs. McDonnell outwardly admired Williams's Rolex and suggested he purchase one for her to give to her husband. But no fear, Mrs. McDonnell's gift acquisitions were not entirely selfless—she also urged the businessman to fund a $15,000 shopping trip for her at Bergdorf Goodman's in 2011. Williams declined to purchase her an Oscar de la Renta dress to wear to the inauguration, for fear that might be too obvious.

The informants to the Washington Post spoke under anonymity, as the relationship between the Williams and McDonnell family is currently under federal investigation.

The Governor has received over $300,000 in gifts since 2002. Elected officials must disclose gifts received worth over $50. However, gifts given to family, do not have to be disclosed, thus establishing a potential loophole for the shopping spree, daughter's wedding catering, and the swanky timepiece.

[The Washington Post, image via AP]

After a half-day filibuster that was controversially halted by Lt. Gov. David Dewhurst, Republicans in the Texas Senate scrambled to quickly pass the equally controversial abortion bill SB5, but were halted themselves by two hours of motions and parliamentary inquiries from Democrats trying to run out the clock on Gov. Rick Perry's special session.

In the end, it all came down to a last-minute vote that could barely be heard over the din of cheers from pro-choice activists gathered in the gallery.

But where did that last minute fall — before or after the bill's midnight deadline?

The Associated Press and several other large media outlets initially reported that the bill had passed, taking Lt. Gov. Dewhurst's word that the vote was taken "just before" 12 AM.

But Democratic State Senators and the tens of thousands who witnessed the vote live on a YouTube stream were skeptical.

As well they should have been.

Screengrabs of the official SB5 results page captured by several wonks clearly show the record vote was called after midnight local time, and was therefore dated 6/26.

But seconds later the results page was suddenly taken down, and when it returned, the vote's date had miraculously been altered to make it seem as though it had been cast in time — on 6/25.

So what happened? Did someone tamper with official state documents? It would seem so, and that's a crime.

As Technology Policy Analyst Kathy Gill notes over at The Moderate Vote:

In my experience (I’ve done web work since 1993 or so), pages like this one are automatically generated from a database file. In other words, a person doesn’t code the page.

In order to change something like this, someone has to change the database. And things like votes and official times, they’re often (usually?) automatically generated also.

In other words, changes like this are deliberate.

Ultimately, Lt. Gov. Dewhurst conceded that the vote was three minutes too late, and SB5 was pronounced dead.

But that doesn't mean it won't rise again. In fact, it almost certainly will.

And when it does, will the same people still be watching to make sure the official voting record keeps the official minutes?

[H/T: The Daily Dot, photo via AP]

A new report says the majority of Americans with student loans are "concerned they will be unable to repay their debt." Next week, federal student loan rates are likely to double.