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The Definitive Pop Music Mashup of 2013 is Here

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Moving right along from the definitive movie mashup of the year to the definitive pop music mashup of the year.

Professional synergist DJ Earworm has reemerged to sum up the year's top 25 pop songs as determined by Billboard's weekly Hot 100 charts with his annual United State of Pop mashup.

Dubbed "Living the Fantasy," this year's selection includes tired hits from Daft Punk, Miley Cyrus, Katy Perry, Lorde, and more, breathed new life thanks to Earworm's magic touch (a full list of songs can be found in the video's description).

Warning: They don't call him Earworm for nothing.

[H/T: MeFi]


Scott Walker's Aide Fired For Bizarre Cuss-Laden Anti-Latino Tweets

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Scott Walker's Aide Fired For Bizarre Cuss-Laden Anti-Latino Tweets

Wisconsin Gov. Scott Walker (R), who's trying to generate buzz for a possible 2016 presidential run, had to fire a campaign aide today for her past racist Twitter rants against Latinos—the second such incident to rock Walker's administration since last summer.

The Milwaukee Journal-Sentinel reports that Taylor Palmisano, Walker's deputy campaign finance director, was let go Tuesday after activists pointed out her old grumpy "fuck"-filled tweets about "illegal" people who were bothering her on the bus and in the library by being... well, just by being:

In one, Palmisano, 23, complained about an individual who was doing custodial work in a library in which she was working.

"I will choke that illegal mex cleaning in the library. Stop banging (expletive) chairs around and turn off your Walkman," she posted on March 9, 2011.

Two months earlier, she went to Twitter to write about her bus trip from Pasadena, Calif., to Las Vegas after watching the Wisconsin Badgers play in the Rose Bowl: "This bus is my worst (expletive) nightmare Nobody speaks English & these ppl dont know how 2 control their kids #only3morehours #illegalaliens."

Palmisano has since deleted her Twitter account. This was the second such firing since August, when another Walker aide—Steven Krieser, assistant deputy secretary of the Wisconsin department of transportation—lost his job after writing on Facebook that illegal immigrants were the spawn of Satan:

[W]e get to be treated to the incredible chutzpah of hundreds of thousands of these criminals marching in the streets in broad daylight, demanding all the benefits of citizenship from a country whose laws they are breaking even as they are standing there. The illegals themselves have bred the animus that many American citizens feel toward them You may see Jesus when you look at them. I see Satan.

Krieser added in that post that critics were wrong to say "that opposition to illegal immigration generally is driven primarily by racism."

[Photo credit: Milwaukee Journal-Sentinel]

This Commercial Is So Scary It Requires a Health Warning

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It's being called the "scariest commercial ever," because it is.

In fact, this just-released ad for Japanese tire retailer Autoway Tires is so scary, it's prefaced with a health warning and a liability disclaimer.

"Not for the faint of heart," warns the ad. "Please refrain from watching the content if any of the following applies to you: Have any mental or physical health concern and may have to see a doctor regularly."

Autoway goes on to caution viewers that it "shall not be liable for any injuries, illness, and damages claimed to be caused by watching the contents."

Still not sold on just how scary this ad is? Then turn up the volume, turn down the lights, and proceed.

You have been warned.

[H/T: Most Watched Today]

Deadspin Mentally Challenged High School Athlete Killed For His Headphones | Gizmodo Canada's About

A union rep has confirmed that the engineer of the Metro-North train that crashed in the Bronx on Su

Walmart Was Selling Knockoffs of Banksy's "Destroy Capitalism"

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Walmart Was Selling Knockoffs of Banksy's "Destroy Capitalism"

Up until today, Walmart was selling Banksy knockoffs on the Walmart website. The company has since disabled the listing, blaming the irony on a third-party vendor.

According to Slate, the third-party vendors say they got the prints from another third-party vendor. Banksy's reps told LAist that the prints are counterfeit reproductions and that they were "dealing" with Walmart about them.

Kanye Wants Andy Warhol's Insane "Cousin" To Make a Warhol Knockoff

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Kanye Wants Andy Warhol's Insane "Cousin" To Make a Warhol Knockoff

Given Andy Warhol's iconic quote "In the future, everyone will be famous for fifteen minutes," it's no surprise that Kanye West is a big Warhol fan. Which is precisely why he's commissioning Warhol to paint a portrait of his animatronic sex doll fiancee Kim Kardashian—except Andy is long since dead, and the piece is a knockoff made by a batshit crazy distant relative of the artist.

As Page Six reports, Monica Warhol calls herself a cousin of Andy's (her grandfather and Andy's father were brothers), though she never met the artist himself, who died when she was 10. Aside from being an artist, Monica is also completely bananas, which makes her a perfect match for Kanye.

According to her website, she took up art after taking art classes at Pima Community College in Tuscon, Arizona. As she told Page Six, she never knew what Andy's work was like, yet magically her style mimicks his quite closely—especially her own Campbells soup can artwork, which she shows off in an interview from a licensing convention. Monica, who once sold Flo Rida two paintings to be used in a music video, is also convinced that her job as an artist is more difficult than having cancer. "It would be easier to get cancer, because there might be a cure. When you're an artist, that's it. You can't change it."

In addition to peddling distant relative knockoffs, according to one of three biographies on her website, Monica is also currently trying to create a reality show with a no-name producer about her craft, her fiance, and her six children.

Kanye West has made a name for himself for attempting to masquerade his asshole tendencies as the machinations of a misunderstood avant garde artist, but after a failed attempt at a highly touted fashion line, and complete lack of clout with Vogue chief Anna Wintour, maybe it's time to conclude that he just has really, really bad taste.

NYC Cop Accused of Running Extortion Racket and Stalking Old Mistress

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NYC Cop Accused of Running Extortion Racket and Stalking Old Mistress

Prosecutors say that a New York police officer conspired with the brother of one of Albania's most wanted criminals to convince business owners in Queens to pay them monthly protection payments. The shining beacon of New York's finest is also accused of stalking his former mistress.

The cop's been accused of shaking down multiple businesses, but prosecutors have specifically cited an Albanian restaurant owner. The owner had just opened a restaurant in Astoria, when he received a visit from Redinel Dervishaj, an Albanian criminal who was also the focus of an NYPD manhunt in Staten Island last year.

After Dervishaj told him he'd have to pay to "operate in our neighborhood," the restaurant owner called Officer Besnik Llakatura for help. Llakatura, who prosecutors say was working with Dervishaj, told the restaurant owner that to pay it because, "These people run Astoria."

According to prosecutors, Llakatura also told the restaurant owner not to call the cops. He also implied the restaurant owner's family was in danger. At some point, a third gangster partner, Denis Nikolla, threatened the restaurant owner at gunpoint.

The restaurant owner made the payments, about $24,000 in all. Llakatura was paid around $6,000.

What Llakatura didn't realize was that the restaurant owner had gone to the FBI, who had been supplying the payment money.

According to the Daily News, prosecutors say Llakatura, who is married with children, also stalked an old mistress who ended things.

When she tried to break off their relationship and report him to the police, the feds intercepted a call in which the cop ordered his wife to get rid of a stash of guns he kept in a linen closet and dump them in the woods.

Llakatura is also the subject of a federal lawsuit alleging he and four other officers brutalized a black motorist.

[image via Shutterstock]


US Citizen Has Been Jailed In Dubai Since April For Making This Video

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A 29-year-old University of Minnesota graduate has been locked up in a Dubai prison since April for making a parody YouTube video about teaching residents of a Satwa, wealthy neighborhood, how to fight. In the video, they learn to throw shoes and call for help over Twitter.

Shezanne Cassim, an American citizen who was born in Sri Lanka, moved to the United Arab Emirates in 2006, to work for PricewaterhouseCoopers. He uploaded the video in October, 2008. Cassim's parents say that the law that he is being charged under wasn't enacted until months after Cassim uploaded the video.

The law allows the state to prosecute the creators of parodies that are "liable to endanger state security and its higher interests or infringe on public order".

“It’s like somebody in the United States making a parody video of a Brooklyn hipster, and being held in jail for it and being held in jail for months without bail,” his brother, Shervon Cassim, told KARE. “That’s what’s going on here.”

It's not clear when or even if Cassim will get out. His father moved to Dubai after his arrest, but Cassim has been refused bail each time he requests it. His next court hearing is supposed to be scheduled for December 16.

[via YouTube]

In the last year, the TSA has collected more than $500,000 in change left behind by passengers at se

[New York's smallest mayor helped to light the world's largest menorah Tuesday night.

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[New York's smallest mayor helped to light the world's largest menorah Tuesday night. Photo by Andrew Burton via Getty.]

A data company went through 600,000 of those "may be monitored" consumer phone calls and figured out

Police Are Offering a $10,000 Reward For the Best Bourbon in the World

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Police Are Offering a $10,000 Reward For the Best Bourbon in the World

Kentucky police are expending resources and rewards to try to find the thieves who took $26,000 worth of rare bourbon and rye from a distillery in October.

Nearly 200 bottles of revered, exalted 20-year-old Pappy Van Winkle Family Reserve bourbon and 27 bottles of 13-year-old Van Winkle rye disappeared from a locked warehouse in October, making headlines due to the quality and rarity of the brand.

At the time, Sheriff Pat Melton sounded confident he could crack the case, saying, "I think it’s going to be a tough case to solve... You got about 50 employees that had access.”

But despite interviewing more than 100 people and monitoring Craigslist, eBay and bourbon blogs for weeks, police have not found the bourbon.

Melton still seems confident though, telling the AP that the heightened attention to the case has "made it extremely hot to try to move or sell right now," and adding, "The net is narrowing."

[image via Shutterstock]

Martin Bashir announced his resignation from MSNBC today, two weeks after he suggested, on-air, that

Woman Loses Lotto Ticket, Finds Out It's Worth $47 Million

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Woman Loses Lotto Ticket, Finds Out It's Worth $47 Million

Man, if I had $47 million for every time I lost a lottery ticket, I'd be Kathryn Jones.

Jones, of Hamilton, Ontario, purchased a Lotto Max ticket over a year ago, and then promptly lost it.

She had completely forgotten about it until last week, when lottery officials showed up at her door just two days before the claim cutoff to tell her she'd won the jackpot: $50 million (~US$47 million).

The Ontario Lottery and Gaming Corporation (OLG) spent many long months waiting for the winning ticket holder to come forward until, one day, a false claim inadvertently led them to the convenience store where Jones bought her ticket.

A lengthy investigation was launched involving surveillance footage, time stamps, and credit card receipts that ultimately led OLG investigators to Jones's house.

"We weren't sure we wanted to let them in the house," Jones told CBC News. "Then they showed us their ID, so they came in and sat down and started asking a number of questions."

After confirming Jones's identity, OLG's agents informed her she had just spent the past year being an unwitting millionaire.

"I feel almost as though I have been struck by lightning twice because first to win is pretty incredible, but then to lose a ticket and then to have OLG find me and take the initiative to actually contact me is also pretty incredible," Jones told reporters at a Tuesday press conference.

Jones will have to wait another 30 days in order to collect her prize, but what's another 30 days.

[screengrab via CBC]


A man was arrested today for throwing an unidentified item over the White House's north fence.

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A man was arrested today for throwing an unidentified item over the White House's north fence. Pennsylvania Avenue was closed for about an hour, but no explosives were found.

That Kennedy VJ From MTV Is Still Alive, And She's Getting a Fox Show

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That Kennedy VJ From MTV Is Still Alive, And She's Getting a Fox Show

Since everyone gets to talk on TV for money these days, why not MTV's early-'90s token conservative, too?

Kennedy, the dark-haired one who hosted Alternative Nation, is totally alternative to alternative now: She's agreed to co-host The Independents, a new talk show for libertarians on Fox Business News. Her on-air compatriots will be two dudes, one of whom is non-white, so it looks to be the most statistically diverse collection of libertarians in human history.

Always the freethinker trying to escape MTV's confining box of commercially viable social liberalism, Lisa Montgomery Kennedy was long castigated by viewers (and voted most-hated VJ) for her right-of-center views and her pink GOP elephant thigh tattoo. But the registered Republican from Oregon also likes weed, explicit lyrics, and money, so Music Television always seemed like a natural choice.

We wish her luck at FBN. If it doesn't work out, maybe she can cameo on Portlandia.

[Photo credit: AP]

College Student Films Telenovela for Spanish Class, Wins Homework

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Julie Bryan's Spanish professor told the class they had to prove they could speak the language by filming themselves either being interviewed or singing a song, so she decided to produce a telenovela instead.

Together with her husband Mitch, her brother Johnny, her classmate Adam, and "body double" Rocky Ramon, Julie wrote, directed, and starred in the greatest Spanish homework assignment since the dawn of Spanish homework assignments.

Sure, the Spanish isn't, how you say, perfecto, but what it lacks in language skills, El Amor de Mi Amante totally makes up for in Doritos Locos Tacos plugs (RIP Todd Mills).

And, in case it wasn't obvious, Julie and Adam totally got A's. The songs got B's and C's.

[H/T: Reddit]

This Week in Tabloids: A Detailed Analysis of Ke$ha's Plastic Surgery

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This Week in Tabloids: A Detailed Analysis of Ke$ha's Plastic Surgery

Welcome back to Midweek Madness, your spelunking trip into the dark caves of the celebrity gossip tabloids. Every Wednesday, Callie Beusman heads to the newsstand and picks up the new issues of In Touch, Ok!, Life & Style, Star and Us, and together we navigate the stalagmites masquerading as "news." This week: Angie and Brad are fighting and having hot dates in luxe hotels; Kim and Kanye will get married at Versailles; and Ke$ha's "fresh faced" new look is all thanks to plastic surgery. Down the hole we go.


This Week in Tabloids: A Detailed Analysis of Ke$ha's Plastic Surgery

Star

"WORST FIGHT EVER"

Angelina and Brad got into the worst fight ever, guys. The cover image of Angelina crying is from the Sarajevo premiere of In The Land of Blood and Honey, where she broke into tears while describing the plight of the people in Syria, but that's not what the fight was about. The fight was way worse than that. The fight was because Brad "canoodled" with a petite brunette at a bar in Telluride. Ooookay. In other news, Orlando Bloom and Liv Tyler are secretly dating. The couple were spotted "getting cozy" during opening night of Waiting for Godot. Is that even possible? Later they were spotted tickling each other and gazing into each other's eyes. Moving on: Kate Gosselin is blowing through her kids' college funds to pay for plastic surgery and vacations for herself. She is the worst. The end. Next: Jennifer Aniston and Justin Theroux's relationship is in SHAMBLES. Evidence one: he was not Instagrammed at her Thanksgiving. Evidence two: he is shooting a movie in New York City, where his ex-girlfriend lives (along with a mere 8 million other people). They're doomed.

Grade: F (cave collapse/crushed by rocks)


This Week in Tabloids: A Detailed Analysis of Ke$ha's Plastic Surgery

Ok!

"OBSESSED WITH PLASTIC SURGERY"

Someone at the mag crafted a lovely collage of Before and After plastic surgery photos of all your favorite celebrities, but probably half of them haven't really had that many procedures. Kim Kardashian might have just gotten freakishly good at contouring, and Angelina Jolie looks exactly the same as "before," only 15 years older (Fig. 1). But, yeah, rich and famous people get cosmetic procedures. Who would have guessed. The rest of the magazine consists of boring stories that everyone read last week: Kendall Jenner and Harry Styles went on a date (we know), Angelina Jolie bought Brad a heart-shaped island (we heard that forever ago, and it's not true), blah blah. The only good bit: Kate Middleton is terrified because her family has been invited to spend Christmas with Queen Elizabeth II. She is worried that her mom will get drunk and engage in class warfare and upset the queen. Off with 'er head!

Grade: F (trapped in underwater cave with a posse/shiver of sharks)


This Week in Tabloids: A Detailed Analysis of Ke$ha's Plastic Surgery

Life & Style

"MY DIET IS BETTER THAN GASTRIC BYPASS!"

Here's the deal: Miranda Lambert lost 30 pounds in eight weeks. She did so by cutting sugar and getting into juicing and working out a whole lot. If any of this sounds familiar it's because Us did this exact same story November 13th. Same quotes, same details about push-ups and "signature" margaritas made with Sprite Zero. And it was boring back then, too. Recycling is good for the environment but bad for tabloids. Moving on: Liam Hemsworth wants to date Jennifer Lawrence, but she's happy in her relationship with Tony from Skins, so it's a no-go. Yawn. Kris Jenner sees Kylie and Kendall as her "newest moneymakers," and is "pushing" them to date stars, "making them" live public lives and "forcing them" to show skin in photo shoots. Surely no harm can come of this. Finally: Ke$ha did a no-makeup makeup look at the American Music Awards and looked beautiful. But! a "doctor" in cahoots with the mag claims Ke$ha got a brow lift, a nose job, cheek implants and a chin implant. Look, we're always willing to call rhinoplasty!!! when we see it, but this just seems like excellent macquillage artistry, non? (Fig. 2)

Grade: F (attacked in a cave by dark cloud of rabid bats)


This Week in Tabloids: A Detailed Analysis of Ke$ha's Plastic Surgery

In Touch

"WHAT BRUCE KNOWS"

Bruce Jenner could potentially get a $15-million dollar advance to write a tell-all, which he is probably not going to do. But let's speculate about what would go in it anyway! Affairs! Greed! Pushing Kendall and Kylie to do racy photo shoots and have fake relationships with A-Listers! Hooray! Moving on: Miley Cyrus and Lady Gaga are locked in a feud because attention is a limited resource or something. Miley was annoyed when Lady Gaga rode a giant fake horse to the AMAs. Miley misses the halcyon days (the VMAs) when she got all the attention. But also: maybe Miley Is Just Jealous (Fig 3). In other news, Justin Bieber's mom is planning an intervention to keep her son from completing his metamorphosis into unstoppable monster-brat. It may be a bit tough to do, if this sentence is any indication: "Pattie [his mom] breathed a sigh of relief this summer when her son got a tattoo of her eye on his arm." If your son's creepy forearm tattoo is something you can take as a highly positive sign, then you've probably got some work to do? Next: A moment with Heidi and Spencer and finally solves the mystery of how they went through $10 million so quickly. "Every time we'd go out to eat, we'd order $4,000 bottles of wine. Heidi was going to the mall and dropping $20,000 to $30,000 a day," says Spencer. Now, he says, they eat Mexican food from food trucks instead. Such austerity.

Grade: D- (spending the night in a cave filled with eyeless Mexican scorpions)


This Week in Tabloids: A Detailed Analysis of Ke$ha's Plastic Surgery

Us

"FAST LIFE, TRAGIC DEATH"

Two weeks before he died, Paul Walker did an interview with Us and discussed his new movie Hours and his daughter Meadow. There are just a couple of short quotes here, in addition to the already-reported information about the terrible car crash that took his life. Sad stuff. Also inside: Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt have been having some "hot date nights" in which they drive to go have dinner, drink a bunch of wine, and then have security meet them and drive them home. For even steamier encounters, they get a room — to be specific, the $16,000 a night presidential suite at the Hotel Bel-Air. Fuck that sounds good. Room service and thick robes. Yes. Next, the mag claims that Liam Hemsworth wants Miley Cyrus back, which just seems too ridiculous to even pretend to contemplate. Finally! Kanye West wants to marry Kim Kardashian at this little shack, you may have heard of it, it's called Versailles? Thrones, servers in period costumes with tricorn hats, foie gras and veal. This report has already been denied, but it's fun to picture Kanye in ermine and high heels. If someone out there (Kehinde Wiley?) wants to paint/Photoshop Kanye's face onto the Sun King's body, we will be forever in awe of thine glory.

Grade: C (24 hours alone in an ice cave)


Addendum

This Week in Tabloids: A Detailed Analysis of Ke$ha's Plastic Surgery

Fig. 1, from Ok!

This Week in Tabloids: A Detailed Analysis of Ke$ha's Plastic Surgery

Fig. 2, Life & Style

This Week in Tabloids: A Detailed Analysis of Ke$ha's Plastic Surgery

Fig. 3, Star

The NSA Is Tracking Hundreds of Millions of Cellphones Around the World

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The NSA Is Tracking Hundreds of Millions of Cellphones Around the World

Every day, the NSA collects almost five billion records tracing the movements of hundreds of millions of cell phones from around the world, according to report in the Washington Post based on an Edward Snowden-provided classified document.

A giant database stores the information, which the NSA gathers by tapping into cables that connect cell phone networks in the U.S. and internationally. While the NSA does not target U.S. citizens, information about millions of Americans' using cell phones abroad is collected "incidentally."

"[T]here is no element of the intelligence community that under any authority is intentionally collecting bulk cellphone location information about cellphones in the United States," Robert Litt, general counsel for the Office of the Director of National Intelligence, told the Post.

The programs used by the NSA, collectively called CO-TRAVELER, analyzes the bulk data—the vast majority of which is taken from cellphones owned by people of no national security interest to the NSA— in order to discover the associates of established intelligence targets.

From the Washington Post:

Still, location data, especially when aggregated over time, is widely regarded among privacy advocates as uniquely sensitive. Sophisticated mathematical techniques enable NSA analysts to map cellphone owners' relationships by correlating their patterns of movement over time with thousands or millions of other phone users who cross their paths. Cellphones broadcast their locations even when they are not being used to place a call or send a text.

CO-TRAVELER and related tools require the methodical collection and storage of location data on what amounts to a planetary scale. The government is tracking people from afar into confidential business meetings or personal visits to medical facilities, hotel rooms, private homes and other traditionally protected spaces.

"One of the key components of location data, and why it's so sensitive, is that the laws of physics don't let you keep it private," Chris Soghoian, the principal technologist at the American Civil Liberties Union, told the Post.

Even using disposable cellphones or turning off your phone between calls triggers CO-TRAVELER, which can track when a new cellphone is activated immediately or shortly after another is disconnected.

"[T]he only way to hide your location is to disconnect from our modern communication system and live in a cave," Soghoian said.

[Image via AP]

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