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Love & Hip Hop Star Testifies Under Oath That Reality Shows Aren't Real

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Love & Hip Hop Star Testifies Under Oath That Reality Shows Aren't Real

Are you sitting down? Please do so if not because the bomb I'm about to aggregate on your ass just might knock you over. Ready?

Reality TV...isn't real (!!!). Dead yet?

We've suspected it for years and now we have proof via Love & Hip Hop Atlanta star Joseline Hernandez recent court deposition. Hernandez is being sued for attacking her co-star Althea Eaton during the show's most recent reunion. Via TMZ, here's what Hernandez said regarding the reality content of her reality show:

With reality TV, it's mostly...it's called 'reality,' but it's a lot of acting in the reality world. And I say that because a lot of the girls that's on the show, they act. And so, it's a lot of acting in a reality TV show, whether it's Love & Hip Hop or another show...The reality TV show showcases a lot of who we are not, and I say that because it's just like, you never know what happens in a reality TV, you know? I mean, they'll showcase your music, they'll showcase certain things, but that's not who Joseline Hernandez is.

Despite this coming from a self-admitted unreliable source, it would appear that Love & Hip Hop is nothing more than improv ratchet theater. What's next, is Joseline Hernandez going to admit that she's not an actual Puerto Rican princess?!?

[Image via Getty]


Just Drink Water

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Just Drink Water

A new study of America's woefully inadequate parents finds that many of you have mistaken beliefs about nutrition that will—in all likelihood—one day kill your kids. Allow us to help you with a useful public health guideline.

USA Today reports on a new study published by researchers at the University of Connecticut that quantifies just how little you, America's parents, understand about how to raise your very own children. Jesus. Do your innocent children even stand a chance?

The vast majority of parents give kids sugary drinks regularly. Some 96% of parents say they gave sugary drinks to their kids in the month prior to the survey. The most common sugary drinks that parents give kids are fruit drinks — given by 77% of parents in the past month, the survey found. Some 80% of parents of children age 2 to 5 provided fruit drinks, such as Capri Sun or Sunny D.

Equally significant, nearly half of parents surveyed rated flavored waters as healthy, and more than one-quarter considered fruit drinks and sports drinks to be healthy.

Not only are you, the Sugar Baron parents of America, feeding your children beverages that will almost certainly cause them to become diabetic amputees at some point in their brief lives, but you are doing so under the mistaken impression that many of these sugar water concoctions are healthy.

They are not. They are water saturated with sugar. Most everything in the soda aisle is sugar water. Most everything in the "fruit juice" aisle is sugar water. Most everything in the "sports drink" aisle is sugar water. In addition to your many other inadequacies as a parent, you seem to be constitutionally unable to prevent your child from ingesting mountainous quantities of sugar. In order to protect your children from a horrible medical fate—and in order to assuage the future guilt you are doomed to carry over your nutritional death sentence—we, the scientists of Gawker.com, have prepared this guide to liquid nutrition for all American parents. Study it. Memorize it. Make it a part of your family's daily lives.

WHAT SHOULD YOUR CHILDREN DRINK?

  • Water

-Ends-

Make no deviations from this list until further notice.

[Photo: Flickr]

Channing Tatum's Baby Is Literally Channing Tatum's Face on a Baby Body

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Channing Tatum's Baby Is Literally Channing Tatum's Face on a Baby Body

Did you know Channing Tatum's baby has plagiarized his face and copied it directly onto her baby body without attribution? We discovered this today after coming across the above photo of Channing's wife Jenna (clad in star-printed pants—see below) carrying the couple's child Everly (also clad in star-printed pants—see above) in Los Angeles.

This nearly-identical image of Channing's face photoshopped onto Everly's body illustrates the startling resemblance. The paternity of this baby is clear—but was a mother involved at all, or did Channing Tatum reproduce asexually, like a protist?

Channing Tatum's Baby Is Literally Channing Tatum's Face on a Baby Body

Here is a side-by-side comparison of the two photos. Can you tell which is the original and which has been doctored?

Channing Tatum's Baby Is Literally Channing Tatum's Face on a Baby Body

I bet Channing presents his coloring book pages to Jenna for inspection, too.


Contact the author at allie@gawker.com.

[Photo via Wenn, image by Jim Cooke]

Cheese Thieves Bilk Hungry Howies Out of $85K in Mozzarella

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Cheese Thieves Bilk Hungry Howies Out of $85K in Mozzarella

Sorry, patrons of Hungry Howies Pizza—a $85,000 shipment of shredded mozzarella on its way to a distribution center in Lakeland, Fla. was stolen.

The driver, the Ocala Star-Banner reports, was transporting the cheese with his girlfriend when they left the trailer at Hubbard's Truck Parking last Saturday night to have the hauler checked by a mechanic. When the driver's girlfriend drove by the parking lot Sunday, the trailer—and all the cheese—was gone.

According to NBC Miami, while police were investigating the scene, they learned of a trailer hauler that was also stolen from the same parking lot, "presumably to take the [cheese] trailer."

And get this: the trailer housing the $85,000 worth of mozzarella is apparently valued at $62,000. A $147,000 heist.

[Image via Shutterstock]


Contact the author at aleksander@gawker.com .

Shots Reportedly Fired at Lil Wayne's Miami Home, Four Possible Injuries

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Shots Reportedly Fired at Lil Wayne's Miami Home, Four Possible Injuries

Local media outlets are reporting that shots were fired at Lil Wayne's Miami Beach home. According to Miami's WSVN, police have not yet entered the house, and a SWAT team is on the way.

A source told WSVN that police responded to a call of shots fired at the home, with four possible injuries. The caller was reportedly not on the scene, and the injuries have not been confirmed.

According to TMZ, Lil Wayne was not at the house at the time. Young Money, Wayne's record label, tweeted that the rapper is "okay" and was not at home.

Watch a live stream of WSVN's coverage here.


Contact the author at andy@gawker.com.

The "Blurred Lines" Verdict Is Bad News, Even If You Hate Robin Thicke

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The "Blurred Lines" Verdict Is Bad News, Even If You Hate Robin Thicke

Thanks to the decision of a Los Angeles jury yesterday afternoon, pop-music fans have a fun, frightening new game to play: Who's Next? No, not named after the Who album—though maybe its infamous pissing-on-the-wall cover shot might now inspire a lawsuit from Andrew Loog Oldham, who as the Rolling Stones' manager spread the rumor that his charges had urinated all over a gas station after the attendant wouldn't let Mick, Keith and co. use a restroom. So maybe instead, let's call it Who's Suing Who—hell, maybe the Who themselves will sue Pearl Jam, or Guided by Voices, or anyone else whose windmilled power chords sound a little too familiar.

The improbably sympathetic victim here is Robin Thicke, whose 2013 smash "Blurred Lines"—co-written (or entirely written, as Thicke conceded in a wildly embarrassing pretrial deposition) by Pharrell Williams—will cost the pair $7.3 million in damages for willfully infringing upon Marvin Gaye's 1977 no. 1 hit "Got to Give It Up." If that amount seems exorbitant—and it is—consider that the Gaye estate had originally asked for some $25 million, including $11 million in Thicke tour proceeds following the record's success.

The irony is that the suit, which first popped up in August 2013, was initiated not by Nona, Frankie, and Marvin Gaye III, who own their father's copyrights, but by the "Blurred Lines" songwriters—including T.I., whose guest verse escaped legal consequences—as a sort of preemptive defensive strike against the Gaye family, as well as the copyright holders of Funkadelic's "Sexy Ways," which that song's publisher, Bridgeport Music, claimed was sampled. (Funkadelic leader George Clinton, who inveighs at length against Bridgeport in his recently published memoir, tweeted his support for Robin and Pharrell.)

The idea that "Blurred Lines" somehow caused the Gaye family any financial hardship is absurd on its face—as if purchasing Thicke's song somehow stopped anyone from checking out "Got to Give It Up" as well or instead. In fact, the opposite occurred—the suit brought so much renewed attention to Gaye's song that its sales nearly doubled during the trial.

Even if the estate's alarming victory doesn't extend a song's copyright from composition of music and lyrics to production quality and "feel"—the judge specifically rejected the latter argument before the case went to trial, leaving the case to be decided entirely by a sheet-music comparison— the verdict is still nefarious. For all their similarities, "Blurred Lines" differs substantially and audibly from "Got to Give It Up" in both melody and lyrics—even lyrical topic, unless you happen to think all songs about dancing are the same. Even the singers themselves come off as very different animals: Gaye is a wallflower, Thicke an up-for-it horndog.

Of course, in the latter case, that's what a lot of people disliked about "Blurred Lines" to begin with. For many, Thicke was a new name, though he'd been making R&B hits for years by that point; the song led off his sixth album. The video, featuring three essentially nude female models (and a goat) cavorting among three fully clothed men, fanned the flames of accusations that the lyrics—specifically, the refrain "I know you want it"—condoned rape. Even if your thinking didn't go that far, the song came off as the work of a man with a profound staring problem, and for many, it left Thicke, whose subsequent musical adventures have been poorly received, teed up for some righteous karmic retribution.

So naturally, when yesterday's verdict was announced, the "LOL, fuck Robin Thicke" tweets kicked up in no time. (Good thing that Marvin Gaye, the sainted author of "You Sure Love to Ball" and "Masochistic Beauty," never recorded anything skeevy.) I encourage vocal fans of this verdict to demonstrate their solidarity by deleting and/or destroying every piece of music they own featuring an unlicensed sample or bearing a notable resemblance to an earlier piece of music. But they won't, and they shouldn't, because that would entail deleting just about everything. Even if you loathe Thicke, this is no cause for celebration, because the size of the Gaye estate's bounty is only going to encourage more lawsuits like this one.

Immediately tiresome as the "LOL Thicke" meme is, the "Maybe this will encourage musicians to be creative again" one is stupider, because pop music is often most creative—and exciting—when its makers are in dialogue with one another. If the '60s, for example, were such a locus of nonstop originality, why did a classic single like the Knickerbockers' "Lies" sound so much like John Lennon circa Help!? Flat-out Dylan imitation was the coin of the realm—not just in a great one-shot like Mouse's "A Public Execution," but the Rolling Stones' "Jigsaw Puzzle" or even the Four Tops' "Bernadette," which Phil Spector once called "a black man singing Bob Dylan." As Dave Marsh points out in The Heart of Rock and Soul, "When Levi Stubbs sings, 'They pre-tend to be my friend,' his cadence is as unmistakably Dylanesque as anything that ever came from the mouths of the Byrds or Manfred Mann."

Obviously not all such musical dialogue is healthy. Last November, an Internet joker calling himself Sir Mashalot put together a YouTube clip he dubbed "Mind-Blowing SIX Song Country Mashup!", laying tracks by Blake Shelton, Luke Bryan, Cole Swindell, Parmalee, Florida-Georgia Line, and Chase Rice atop each other in crisscrossing layers like lasagna, or plaid. Modern country stars could use this verdict as the impetus to spend the rest of their careers suing each other; as this delightful 2009 mashup proved, Nickelback might consider suing themselves.

But that kind of borrowing and rewriting is pop's lifeblood. Here's Lester Bangs, writing in 1979:

According to one theory, punk rock all goes back to Ritchie Valens's "La Bamba." Just consider Valens's three-chord mariachi squawk up in the light of "Louie Louie" by the Kingsmen, then consider "Louie Louie" in the light of "You Really Got Me" by the Kinks, then "You Really Got Me" in the light of "No Fun" by the Stooges, then "No Fun" in the light of "Blitzkrieg Bop" by the Ramones, and finally note that "Blitzkrieg Bop" sounds a lot like "La Bamba."

Push that theory into the '90s, and you can throw in Nirvana's "Smells Like Teen Spirit," too—which, as Rolling Stone once noted, refried the riff from "More Than a Feeling." Will Boston founder Tom Scholz be suing the Kurt Cobain estate now, too? Will Tom Petty, who could probably sue several modern country stars himself, and who earned a retroactive songwriting credit for Sam Smith's "Stay With Me" earlier this year, spend the rest of his career cashing similar checks from, say, the Strokes? (Petty's longtime keyboardist, Benmont Tench, publicly disagreed with the verdict yesterday: "I think they took production & arrangement ideas but not the actual song.")

That's what I mean by Who's Suing Who? The possibilities are endless—and many portend chilling things. Think of Bruno Mars alone: Might the Police sue over his solo smash "Locked Out of Heaven"? Would Norman Whitfield have a case against Cee Lo's "Fuck You," a Mars co-write? How about this year's Mark Ronson No. 1 "Uptown Funk"—any number of post-disco funk bands might go for a piece of that one now, even though it bears a general resemblance to many and a close one to few. (Nona Gaye, incidentally, used to work with Prince; one wonders if she'd have encouraged James Brown to sue the Purple One over "Housequake," or the Marc Bolan estate to cite infringement over "Cream.")

It's especially troubling given how tight copyright control has gotten. Prior to 1976, a copyright was good for 28 years, with the possibility of another 28-year extension, before a work became public domain. That allowed for wider, freer dissemination of music, literature, and film that had fallen out of copyright—and in some cases allowed various works to find a wider audience than they'd had the first time. (The most obvious example: It's a Wonderful Life.) But in 1976, copyrights were extended to the author's lifetime plus 50 years, and in 1998, another extension, dubbed the Sonny Bono Act (he was an early proponent), gave copyright holders the rights to a work for up to 120 years. One of that bill's primary sponsors was the Walt Disney Company, which—irony of ironies—made much of its fortune by adapting public-domain fairy tales to the big screen, then slapping a circle-C on them so that no one could take them back the way they themselves had done.

It isn't just musicians who seem more vulnerable now, either: Movie and TV directors pay homage to classic works as a matter of course. It's hard to imagine Martin Scorsese taking someone to court for mimicking one of his trademark tracking shots, or Steven Spielberg taking umbrage at someone else's intricately patterned action sequence. But the possibility for something like that to happen—by the directors themselves or by their heirs—exists now to a degree that it didn't yesterday. Moreover, it now seems less like an "if" now than a "when."


Michaelangelo Matos is the author of the forthcoming The Underground Is Massive: How Electronic Dance Music Conquered America (Dey Street Books, April 2015) and contributes to Rolling Stone, NPR, Red Bull Music Academy Magazine, and more. He lives in Brooklyn.

Photo by Getty.

The Concourse is Deadspin's home for culture/food/whatever coverage. Follow us on Twitter.

This Saturday, hundreds of people are expected to march through Greenwich, Connecticut, the epicente

The Great Internet Debate Over Not Reading White Men

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The Great Internet Debate Over Not Reading White Men

Hello, dear reader, and welcome to The Kerfuffler! I'm your host, fantasy writer, essayist, and mad tweeter, Saladin Ahmed. Every other week I'll be looking at America's seemingly endless culture wars playing out online, tracing their fault lines, and wading hip-deep into comment sections so you don't have to.

My first dispatch comes from the war-torn realm of book publishing.

The internet has been abuzz recently with debates over reading lists and reading habits. Writer K. Tempest Bradford caused a bit of a stir when she challenged readers to stop reading straight white cisgendered male authors for a year. Sunili Govinnage generated her share of outrage when she reported on her year spent deliberately not reading white authors. And in late 2014, the phenomenally successful #WeNeedDiverseBooks campaign took Tumblr and Twitter by storm, sparking a conversation about which books get published and read, and which don't, and what these choices are doing to children's literature.

Many of the responses generated by these articles and initiatives have been supportive — even from those white male authors 'targeted' for exclusion. Neil Gaiman, whose novel American Gods appears crossed out in red at the top of Bradford's piece, told "anyone hoping for outrage" that he thought Bradford's suggestion was "great":

Bestselling author John Scalzi tweeted similar support:

Meanwhile, Daniel Handler (aka Lemony Snicket) responded to criticism of his self-described racist jokes at the National Book Awards ceremony last year. Instead of doubling down, he met the criticism with that rarest of things: a sincere apology, backed by a donation of more than $100,000 to We Need Diverse Books.

The Great Internet Debate Over Not Reading White Men

Not all responses have been so generous, of course. The comments on Govinnage's piece are rife with cries of 'reverse racism!' (a thing that, it must be noted, does not actually exist). Those commenting on Bradford's story went so far as to call her reading challenge "intolerant, censorious, and an obstruction of the free exchange of ideas that is essential to freedom itself." Bradford was subjected to a slew of remarkably bilious attacks on Twitter and elsewhere. Inevitably the right-wing blogosphere had its say too, with writers like the conservative scifi/fantasy author and GamerGate favorite Larry Correia comparing "SJWs" like Bradford to — wait for it — neo-Nazi skinheads.

So...is this a zero-sum game? Are the calls to exclude straight white male authors from reading lists the latest example of politically correct thought policing gone mad? Must one spend an entire year ignoring great books by white men in order to be a 'good ally?'

Your Kerfuffler, dear reader, is a free spirit by nature. I'm profoundly suspicious of proscription, particularly when it comes to reading. Stories can change the way we see the world, but it is not their job to do so. Books can save lives, but they are not medicine. And attempts to administer them as such tend to be both unwelcome and unsuccessful. So rather than talk about why book buyers should privilege marginalized writers, let's talk about why they might want to do so.

One reason is — brace yourselves — politics. There are those of us who care about actively trying to make the world a more equitable place. Books are magical things. But they are also consumer goods, and ethical consumption is not just for coffee and sneakers. While many pixels have been spilled in recent years over questions of diversity and representation in fiction, these discussions rarely consider the question of political economy.

'Bestselling author' is, functionally, a job. And nearly every single one of those jobs goes to a white person (quite often a white man). When women still make only seventy five cents for every dollar that men make, and 98% of the New York Times bestseller list is composed of white authors, anyone who reads primarily white male authors is contributing, quite directly, to the economic inequalities that pervade our culture. Now, some readers — particularly those of a politically conservative or libertarian sensibility — don't give a shit about this. Indeed, they may be actively hostile to the very notion of egalitarianism. The market, in their view, is a pure meritocracy. But many other book buyers believe, as I do, that the market itself is racist and sexist in all sorts of unseen ways. Choosing to buy and read books by women and people of color is one small way to address this.

More selfishly, though, seeking out the voices of women, people of color, and LGBT folks will lead you to wonderful books you might not have found otherwise. Indeed, there are a great many wonderful books that you are likely to miss unless you are consciously choosing to privilege those voices.

This is not simply because, as one commenter on Scalzi's response to the debate put it, "humans tend to default" to what they know. It's because, despite the heroic efforts of many agents, editors, and publicists, publishing's marketing machine is a long way from treating all authors equally. It is my sincere belief that most readers don't know just how slanted the publishing industry is toward a narrow sliver of voices. Unless one deliberately seeks out fiction by marginalized writers, the vast, vast majority of books that cross one's radar via TV, radio, magazines, newspapers, and, yes, the internet, are going to be by white people — and most of those white people are going to be straight men.

Now certainly, one could spend one's life reading only books by straight white men, and never run out of wonderful material. But this is akin to spending a lifetime's worth of vacations visiting only Disneyland. Whether or not one agrees with 'the SJWs' that it's ethically contemptible, it is, in a word, boring.


Follow Saladin Ahmed on Twitter.

Watch Dr. Phil's Horrifying Interview With Bobbi Kristina's Boyfriend

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Nick Gordon, who's been described as Bobbi Kristina's boyfriend, sat down with Dr. Phil for a disturbing interview that aired Wednesday during which he appeared inebriated and broken down while trying to talk through his depression.

According to Dr. Phil, Gordon initially approached him to do an interview because he was "being vilified" in the press and wanted to tell his side of the story.

Before bringing him out, Dr. Phil had a one-on-one with Gordon's mom Michelle about how he's been holding up in the wake of Bobbi Kristina's critical condition. The interview is spliced with shots of Gordon in a room, crying and saying, "I miss Krissy." He's been in the building screaming that he wants to die.

Michelle tells Dr. Phil, "He has said to me many times that he is going to kill himself and he's tried [by] taking pills." The whole thing is pretty awful to watch. There's a weird moment where Michelle claims that Whitney brought Nick and Bobbi Kristina to rehab with her on three occasions.

"I believe Whitney wanted to keep them all together as a family so she took Nicholas," says Michelle. "Everywhere her and Krissy went, Nick went. They never separated. They were always together."

Dr. Phil responds, "I've never heard of anybody taking a posse to rehab." Meanwhile, Gordon is upset that he can't see Bobbi Kristina in the hospital.

Michelle: "It's her father [Bobby Brown]. His pride and selfishness. He won't let Nicholas see Krissy because of his pride and his feelings towards Nick."

Dr. Phil: "Do you think the family believes that Nick hurt her?"

Michelle: "I don't believe the Houston side believes that. I don't know about the Browns. My son would never try and hurt Krissy. I don't care what they think. My son would never hurt anyone."

The family is clearly divided. Later in the interview, Gordon tells Dr. Phil, "I hate Bobby Brown!"

Why is this awfulness being filmed? And why is Dr. Phil interviewing an inebriated person? The motives here are questionable, though it's clear Gordon needs serious help.

Dr. Phil wants Gordon to agree to go to inpatient treatment center for his depression, alcoholism, etc. He finds Gordon in the hotel where the interview is being conducted; in the elevator, Dr. Phil asks him how he feels (this is in the clip above). Gordon says:

"I feel like… I miss Krissy and Whitney. Please don't put this on TV...me crying, me being weak."

Gordon sees his mom and runs toward her:

"Mom, I would never hurt anybody. I love people. I love babies. Everything!"

Gordon rolls up his sleeves in preparation. He's out of it and slurring his words:

"You're gonna ask… I've been drinking. I have been doing Xanax... I've been sober besides that."

I'm not really sure what anyone learned from the interaction between Gordon, his mom and Dr. Phil because Gordon was out of it the whole time.

Toward the end of the interview, Dr Phil asks him, "Do you agree that you're very depressed?" He says, "Yes."

Gordon says while crying, "I'm gonna seem so weak in front of the world. I want them back, that's the only thing. I want them back, that's the only thing."

According to TMZ, Gordon followed through with rehab after the taping. Here's another clip of Gordon telling Dr. Phil, in reference to Whitney and Bobbi Kristina, "I wanna let all you guys know, I did everything possible in the world to protect them, even though we did, like, everything."


Contact the author at clover@jezebel.com.

Deadspin The "Blurred Lines" Verdict Is Bad News, Even If You Hate Robin Thicke | io9 How The Sugar

ISIS: Australian Teen Detonated Suicide Bomb at Iraqi Army Outpost

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ISIS: Australian Teen Detonated Suicide Bomb at Iraqi Army Outpost

According to ISIS, an Australian teen named Jake Bilardi, who defected and joined the rebel group sometime late last year, drove a van containing a suicide bomb into an Iraqi army outpost yesterday as part of a series of attacks that killed 17 and injured 38 in Iraq's Anbar Province.

The image above was distributed by the Islamic State, and purports to show the van used in the attack and Bilardi behind the wheel. According to Australia's ABC network, Western officials have not been able to verify ISIS' claims regarding Bilardi, but the timeline does match up to a number of suicide bombs that went off yesterday around the capital city of Ramadi. From ABC:

There is no way to confirm the authenticity of the images, but there was a wave of car bomb attacks in Anbar province on Wednesday (local time).

Twelve car bombs exploded almost simultaneously around the city of Ramadi, capital of Anbar, after dawn with at least seven suicide bombers targeting government security installations, police said.

At least 17 people were killed and 38 wounded, according to a police lieutenant colonel and a doctor at Ramadi hospital.

Bilardi, who also went by the name Abu Abdullah Al Australia, was identified last December as the teenager who ISIS had touted as a young, white, British recruit; as it turns out, Bilaradi was actually from a northern Melbourne suburb.

[image via ABC]

Report: Drunk Secret Service Agents Crashed Car Into White House Barrier

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Report: Drunk Secret Service Agents Crashed Car Into White House Barrier

They may not be very good at their jobs, but at least they're not boring? Yet another pair of Secret Service agents had to be pulled off the rotation this week after they allegedly got drunk and crashed their government vehicle into a White House barricade.

According to the Washington Post, the agents—Mark Connolly, a high-ranking member of Obama's detail, and George Ogilvie, a senior supervisor, had been drinking at a "late-night party" last week when they crashed outside the White House.

Officers on duty who witnessed the March 4 incident wanted to arrest the agents and conduct sobriety tests, according to a current and a former government official familiar with the incident. But the officers were ordered by a supervisor on duty that night to let the agents go home, said these people, who spoke on the condition of anonymity to discuss the sensitive internal matter.

The Department of Homeland Security is handling the investigation, a Secret Service spokesperson confirmed, telling reporters, "If misconduct is identified, appropriate action will be taken based on established rules and regulations.''

President Obama is reportedly "aware of the allegations" and presumably "thankful to be alive" despite his security detail's best efforts to ensure otherwise.


Image via AP. Contact the author of this post at gabrielle@gawker.com

Breaking Bad Creator Asks Fans to Please Stop Terrorizing Elderly Couple

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Breaking Bad Creator Asks Fans to Please Stop Terrorizing Elderly Couple

The problem with lending your home out for TV productions is someone still has to live there afterwards.

And when it's a really popular show, thousands of people might show up trying to throw pizza on top of your roof—the apparent fate of the elderly couple living in the home used for the fictional White family on Breaking Bad.

The roof pizza is an homage to the show but a definite annoyance to Fran and Louie Padilla, who have owned the home for more than 40 years.

["Drive by and see if the lady or man is outside.. The elderly man who lives here will ask where you are from and tell you all the stories you can imagine from the shooting! Whereas the lady who lives here will tell you to leave," one reviewer writes on Roadtrippers.]

Breaking Bad creator Vince Gilligan apparently felt compelled to step in this week. Via Mashable:

In an interview on the Better Call Saul Insider podcast published Tuesday, show creator Vince Gilligan said random pizzas have become a problem for the real-life residents of the fictional home of Walter White.

"They're throwing pizzas on roofs and stuff like that. Let me tell you: There is nothing funny or original or cool about throwing pizzas on this lady's roof," Gilligan said. "It is just not funny. It's been done before. You're not the first."

Burn! Continues Gilligan, "I don't even consider [the pizza-throwers] fans, I consider them jagoffs."

JAGOFFS.


Contact the author of this post at gabrielle@gawker.com

Slipknot Guitarist Stabbed in the Head By His Own Brother

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Slipknot Guitarist Stabbed in the Head By His Own Brother

In what can only appropriately be described as a heavy metal fight, the lead guitarist of Slipknot was rushed to the hospital Wednesday after his own brother stabbed him in the head with a knife.

Police were called early Wednesday morning to separate Slipknot's Mick Thomson and his brother Andrew, who were stabbing one another, apparently for sport, outside Mick's Iowa home. Via the Des Moines register:

Clive police reported the two brothers were fighting and armed with knives in the front yard of a home in the 1900 block of Northwest 129th Street at about 4:25 a.m., according to a news release.

At first the brothers were fighting inside the home, but moved outside after it got physical.

When officers arrived, they found the brothers, both apparently drunk, with serious but not life-threatening stab wounds. Mickeal Thomson had a stab wound in the back of his head.

They were taken to hospitals in separate ambulances.

Cops aren't sure if they're going to make any arrests in the case.

"Neither individual was very cooperative," Clive Police Chief Michael Venema tells the Daily News.


Image via AP. Contact the author of this post at gabrielle@gawker.com

Report: State Rep. Gave His "Possessed" Kids Away to a Child Molester 

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Report: State Rep. Gave His "Possessed" Kids Away to a Child Molester 

An Arkansas politician is defending his decision to "re-home" two of his young adopted daughters by sending them to live with a man who ended up molesting one of them last year.

The story broke last week after police received an anonymous tip that Arkansas state representative Justin Harris and his wife Marsha—who run a pre-school together—had been cashing state adoption subsidies checks for children they weren't taking care of.

In 2013, the Harrises adopted the two young sisters, who—they were reportedly warned—grew up around meth addicts and endured significant emotional and sexual abuse. And less than a year later, the couple decided to to give the girls back, claiming they were just too emotionally damaged to keep.

The state said no, so Harris reportedly decided to "re-home" them, a largely unregulated process that is currently legal in Arkansas. Reports the Hamilton Spectator:

At a press conference last week, Justin Harris said the adopted girls' behavioral problems caused him to fear for his biological children's safety:

One of his new daughters crushed a family pet to death, and his three biological sons started sleeping in their parents' bedroom because they were scared.

But when the politician approached state human services' officials, Justin Harris said the agency refused to help with the girls' problems and threatened to charge the Harrises with abandonment if the children were returned.

The Harrises ended up sending the two girls to live with with Eric and Stacey Francis, college friends of Harris's wife. But although Eric had no criminal record at the time, he would soon be convicted of sexually assaulting the elder sister, who was six at the time.

Harris has publicly blamed the DHS for the debacle, claiming they saddled him with emotionally disturbed, violent children and tacitly approved the re-homing. (DHS employees say the opposite, claiming Harris forced the adoption against their recommendation by wielding influence over the group's director, whose budget Is within his purview.)

But babysitters for the family say the girls [referred to by the pseudonyms "Mary" and "Annie"] weren't violent—the problem, they say, was Harris and his wife believed they were possessed by demons. According to the Arkansas Times:

Chelsey Goldsborough, who regularly babysat for the Harrises, said Mary was kept isolated from Annie and from the rest of the family. She was often confined for hours to her room, where she was monitored by a video camera. The reason: The Harrises believed the girls were possessed by demons and could communicate telepathically, Goldsborough said. Harris and his wife once hired specialists to perform an "exorcism" on the two sisters while she waited outside the house with the boys, she said.

Multiple sources who interacted with the family confirmed Goldsborough's account that the Harrises believed the children were possessed, and another source close to the family said that Marsha Harris spoke openly about the supposed demonic possession.

In fact, Goldsborough tells the Arkansas Times, the family was obsessed with "demonic possession and telepathy."

Goldsborough said the Harrises showed her "a picture of [Mary] where they're like, 'You can see the demon rising from her back,' and it just looked like a little 6-year-old to me." [Mary was 4 or 5.] The separate source close to the Harrises reported seeing a video that Marsha Harris said showed a demon interacting with one of the girls. The source said demons were an "obsession" with Marsha Harris.

The girls have since been adopted by a new family, who say the Harrises' allegations of violent behavior don't add up:

"We are aware of the very public conversation going on about events pertaining to our daughters," they tell the Arkansas Times. "We are deeply grieved over Justin Harris' accusations toward our daughters in order to self-protect; it is inexcusable. Like the Harts, we also have two small dogs and the girls have only been gentle towards them. These girls are happy, healthy children who have gone through things no child should ever have to endure. Since they have been home with us, they have adjusted beautifully and are thriving in our home with unconditional love and patience. We are truly amazed at our daughters' ability to love and bond with us, given all they have experienced. They are both extremely protective toward each other and love each other with all their hearts...We choose to forgive the Harrises and hope they will truly follow Christ in humility and repentance for the mistakes they made in our daughters' lives. Due to the sensitivity of our daughters' story, and out of respect for them, we are asking the public for privacy during this time."


Image via AP. Contact the author of this post at gabrielle@gawker.com


Two Police Officers Shot During Protest in Ferguson

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Two Police Officers Shot During Protest in Ferguson

Two cops were shot early Thursday morning during a protest outside the police station in Ferguson, Mo.

The St. Louis Post-Dispatch confirmed the reports, noting that "several members of the media, including a Post-Dispatch reporter and photographer, were near the officers who were hit."

The shots were fired as police were confronting protesters who had gathered outside the police station...The shots rang out as the protests appeared to be dwindling. Some of the protesters fell to the ground and others ran.

It's still unclear who fired and why, but early reports indicate the assailant was not part of the group protesting outside the station: witnesses say the shots came from the general direction of a "block of homes on Tiffin Avenue."

UPDATE 10:30 am: At a press conference, St. Louis County Police Chief Jon Belmar described the shooting as an "ambush" and said the injuries to the officers were not life-threatening. He also said there are no suspects but police are exploring several leads. Photos from the scene were also released.

UPDATE 9:41 am: From the Associated Press:

A 32-year-old officer from nearby Webster Groves was shot in the face and a 41-year-old officer from St. Louis County was shot in the shoulder, St. Louis County Police Chief Jon Belmar said at a news conference. Both were taken to a hospital, where Belmar said they were conscious. He said he did not have further details about their conditions but described their injuries as "serious."

"I don't know who did the shooting, to be honest with you," Belmar said, adding that he could not provide a description of the suspect or gun.


Image via AP. Contact the author of this post at gabrielle@gawker.com

Babies Can Carry Their Own Bags 

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The photo above shows Kim Kardashian and daughter North West navigating the Charles de Gaulle airport in France. North's luggage is Frozen-themed.


Contact the author at allie@gawker.com.

Arizona Completely Abandons Its Community Colleges

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Arizona Completely Abandons Its Community Colleges

Community colleges are the most democratic forms of higher education, and, you could argue, the most important. Don't tell that to the state of Arizona.

The trend in America is towards acceptance of the fact that there should be more public funding and support for community colleges, which educate nearly half of our nation's undergrads during any given year, and tend to be much more accessible to working people and minorities than four-year colleges are. It is just common sense for states to direct funds to their community colleges to help make them as open as possible. It is an obvious public good.

With that in mind, consider what the brilliant loons who run state politics in Arizona are doing right now: they have cut state subsidies for two community college districts that serve the state's three most populous counties down to zero dollars. Zero. Inside Higher Ed notes that just five years ago, these two districts were getting a combined $70 million from the state; now, they're scheduled to get nada.

This means that Republican state legislators have chosen to cut support for entities that educate hundreds of thousands of the type of Arizona students least able to pay increased tuition and fees. (One of the districts, seeking to avoid charging its students more, has gone begging to corporations for support, essentially marketing themselves as an explicit corporate-training center rather than what you might think of as a "school.") And what principle were these brave legislators defending as they zeroed out these education funds? From the Arizona Republic: "The deeper higher-ed cuts appear tied to Republican legislative leaders' rejection of a $6 or $7 increase in auto registration fees at the Department of Motor Vehicles."

That's some smart legislatin'.

[Photo of a mascot that can no longer be afforded: FB]


Contact the author at Hamilton@Gawker.com.

Deadspin Video: Brawl Leads To Man Being Stabbed At Celtics Game | Gizmodo Powdered Alcohol Is Appro

Rapper Helps Anti-Gay Mother Learn To Accept Her Bisexual Daughter 

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MTV aired remarkable turnaround above in a special broadcast of its new show Truce, a sort of Catfish without catfishing featuring Nev Schulman and rapper Angel Haze as mediators. The show's premiere featured a young woman named Briyonza whose mother Chiquina refused to accept her bisexuality.

Chiquina attributed her bigotry to her religion. In an introductory interview with Schulman, she called gay sex "disgusting" and shared her theories on the origins of same-sex attraction:

You wanna know my thinking of guys dating guys and becoming gay? I think they got molested when they were younger...Girls, I think they just try stuff and I'm not gonna sit there and say if I let a girl lick on me that I wouldn't like it. I mean, I know how I like to be licked. You know what I mean? So, this is how people get hooked on drugs: they try things.

It sounds misguided to a nearly humorous extent, but Chiquina's stance serves to put the phobia in homophobia. Some people shun gay sex because they're afraid they're going to like it.

The show arranged for Chiquina to sit down with her daughter Briyonza and Briyonza's girlfriend Advani. It did not go well. It wasn't until they took a break and Angel Haze shared her story of being estranged from her own mother for over five years now on account of her sexuality (Haze identifies as pansexual) that Chiquina began to see the light. And then it dawned on her: "You should always be happy," she said to her daughter. "Even if you think it's not going to make me happy...well, you should care, but your happiness is more important." And then she invited Briyonza and Advani to dinner the next night.

You hear stories about parents doing 180s like this when they realize that their prejudices are putting their relationships with their queer children in jeopardy. Watching it happen is moving.

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