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Think Elle Macpherson Doesn't Carry Urine Testers in Her Purse? Hah!

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Think Elle Macpherson Doesn't Carry Urine Testers in Her Purse? Hah!

Elle Macpherson, an “Australian businesswoman, television host, model, and actress,” sure, if you say so, carries urine testers in her purse. Don’t believe me? Hah! She said it herself!

“I don’t believe you,” you’re thinking. “Why would Elle Macpherson, a woman I am familiar with from her work as an Australian businesswoman, television host, model, and actress, carry urine testers in her purse? You expect me to believe that she does, just because you say it? You must be crazy.” I don’t, and I’m not. Like I said before: She said it herself.

Here she is, from Page Six, about the most shocking thing she has in her purse:

“A pH balance urine tester kit to check that I’m in an alkaline state.”

See? It’s to check if she’s in an alkaline state. (And she wants to check if she’s in an alkaline state because she “believe[s] that most ailments come from having an acidic body,” which you could have assumed.)

See?


Image via Getty. Contact the author at kelly.conaboy@gawker.com.


Deadspin How Jason Whitlock Is Poisoning ESPN’s “Black Grantland” | Gizmodo Google Attempts to Fight

This Radioactive Fox Made a Good-Looking Sandwich

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Foxes are shrewd, solitary creatures. They use the earth’s magnetic field to hunt. They are the beloved stars of many children’s books and animated films. And when they live in radioactive areas, some foxes, it would seem, develop the useful skill of sandwich-making. Who knew?

BBC shared the video of a radio crew who encountered the fox in Chernobyl, explaining that the fox appeared “unafraid of humans, presumably because they are so rarely seen in the nuclear exclusion zone.”

The future: Where teens suck and foxes know how to make a BLT.

Ariana Grande's Giant Pumpkin Stalker Got Arrested Trying to See Her

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Ariana Grande's Giant Pumpkin Stalker Got Arrested Trying to See Her

You may have thought a psychiatric hold would stop the obsessed man who’s been stalking Ariana Grande and once sent her a 42-pound pumpkin, but no mere institution can hold his love.

TMZ revealed today that 29-year-old Tim Normandin didn’t give up on Lil Ari after he was busted back in December trying to sneak into her record label’s headquarters wearing a Santa suit and then held in a facility for four days. Nay, the man who once sent the itty-bitty poplet a bunch of Yankee candles and an anklet from Kay Jewelers was arrested yet again in March.

Normandin had traveled from his Lowell, Mass. home to Uncasville, Conn., where Ariana was playing the Mohegan Sun Arena, and attempted to get in and meet her. He was arrested for trespassing by the Mohegan Tribal Police and released on $5,000 bond.

On the same day, Normandin declared his undying amor for Ariana Grande—who was still with her jealous rapper boyfriend Big Sean at the time—in a poem on Facebook.

He’s made his profile private since then, but the Daily Mail reports that Normandin expressed sadness that Grande had rejected, “all my love, my care, and my worth / This greatest love I give,” and wondered whether he was worth “more than dirt” to her.

Ariana is very busy and doesn’t have time to deal with this kind of thing, so I have taken the liberty of composing a response on her behalf. It was difficult without access to the entirety of his original work, but I feel it addresses the general ideas contained therein.

Ahem.

Roses are red
Violets are blue
COMPLAINT FOR PROTECTION FROM HARASSMENT
This is a request for a civil order to protect the Plaintiff from future abuse or harassment
See attached affidavit

It doesn’t rhyme, but neither do “worth” and “dirt.”

[h/t TMZ, Photo: YouTube]

Sandler Producers Caught on Camera Arguing With Native American Extras

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You have read the jokes in Adam Sandler’s upcoming Netflix movie The Ridiculous Six that caused Native American extras to walk off the set. Now, you can see a video of Sandler’s producers arguing with the group of Native Americans. “Here’s the thing,” one producer appears to tell the actors in the cell phone footage. “If you’re overly sensitive about it then you should leave.”

In the video, which was uploaded by Indian Country Today Media Network, one actor can be heard arguing with a male producer that the Native cast has “a lot to lose” if the film’s Apache characters are portrayed negatively. “We don’t need to sell out our people.”

“I understand completely,” responds the producer, “but we’re not going to change Beaver Breath.”

Throughout the rest of the clip, the Native actors continue to explain why they feel disrespected, while the producers argue why they should not.

At one point, another actor raises his voice: “You’re trying to tell us what’s disrespectful to us?” he asks. “You’re trying to tell a Native what’s disrespectful to them?”

It’s possible that any press is good press when it comes to a shitty straight-to-Netflix Adam Sandler movie; maybe The Ridiculous Six will serve as a rallying cry for “anti-PC” types much like The Interview.

In the video, at least, the argument was won by no one.

Maryland Governor Declares State of Emergency in Baltimore

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Maryland Governor Declares State of Emergency in Baltimore

Maryland governor Larry Hogan declared a state of emergency in Baltimore Monday evening, activating the National Guard to respond to the violent protests that erupted in the wake of Freddie Gray’s funeral.

Hogan reportedly plans to give a press conference at 8:30 p.m.

UPDATE 11:10 pm: Freddie Gray’s family spoke out against the violent protests and criminal activity at a press conference Monday night. His mother tells protestors, “I want you all to get justice for my son. Don’t do it like this.”

UPDATE 9:35 pm: A senior center built by a church is the reported site of a three-alarm fire currently raging in east Baltimore. The giant blaze can reportedly be seen all over Baltimore.

UPDATE 9:05 pm: Governor Hogan says he’s deployed the National Guard in response to the protests. Via WBAL-TV:

He has access to our full compliment that’s here within the state, which means up to about 5,000 troops that can be put onto the streets to protect property and people. I would highly recommend that we all go in and take cover for the night and actually go to sleep and get some rest and let things settle down so that we can restore order to the city,” Maryland National Guard Gen. Linda Singh said.

The New York Times reports more than 1,000 Baltimore cops and 82 state troopers are already on the ground.

UPDATE 8:23 pm: The Washington Post reports that a police official says 15 officers were injured and two were hospitalized during the day’s protests. At least 27 people have reportedly been arrested so far.

[image via AP]


Contact the author at gabrielle@gawker.com.

A Non-Comprehensive List Of Celebrities Who Self-Identify As Nerds

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A Non-Comprehensive List Of Celebrities Who Self-Identify As Nerds

Celebrities love self-identifying as nerds. They just love it! Put a microphone in front of a celebrity and I’d guess there’s a one in five chance that celebrity is going to work in the fact that they are a nerd. There are two explanations for this:

  1. They want to seem relatable to people who aren’t rich and famous and beautiful.
  2. They are actual nerds.

Whether or not they are actual nerds is up for debate, but these are just some of the many celebrities who love shouting it from the rooftops.

“I’m a nerd.”

-Karlie Kloss

“I’m a nerd, what can I say?”

-Rosie O’Donnell

“I’m a nerd.”

-Sean Lowe

“I’m a nerd at heart.”

-Chris Young

“I can’t deny that I’m a nerd.”

-Katie Holmes

“I’m a nerd.”

-Sanaa Lathan

“I know I’m a nerd!”

-Selena Gomez

“I’m a nerd.”

-Michael Buble

“I’m such a nerd.”

-Natalie Portman

“Yes, I’m a total nerd.”

-Teri Hatcher

“I’m just a nerd.”

-Heather Graham

“I’m a vocabulary nerd.”

-Sam Trammell

“I’m really a nerd.”

-Mindy Kaling

“[I’m] a goofy drama nerd.”

-James Marsden

“I’m a true blue music nerd.”

-Zooey Deschanel

“I’m a Friends nerd.”

-Rachel Bilson

“I’m a writer at heart. Writing is a nerd job.”

-Chris Rock

“I’m such a nerd!”

-Jordana Brewster

“Augustus is quirky, weird, and nerdy. That’s kind of how I am in real life. Really!”

-Ansel Elgort

“I’m a nerd and I don’t smoke pot.”

-Gabourey Sidibe

“I guess I’m a nerd.”

-Jessica Paré

“I’m a nerd.”

-Michael Fassbender

“I’m more of a nerd.”

-Colin Firth

“I’m just, like, a fucking nerd who works all the time.”

-Seth Rogen

“I am such a nerd.”

-Mila Kunis

“I’m a nerd that way.”

-Ellen Page

“I’m a nerd.”

-Orlando Jones

“I’m a nerd. But I’m not that hard-core.”

-Joe Manganiello

“I’m just a nerd.”

-Keri Russell

“I’m a nerd, that’s right!”

-Chris Hemsworth

“I know I’m a nerd.”

-Redman

“I know—I’m a nerd.”

-Jessica Alba

“I’m a nerd out to end poverty.”

-Bono

“I get a lot that people have a hard time believing that I’m a nerd.”

-Zachary Levi

Image via screengrab.


Contact the author at bobby@jezebel.com.

Raging Three-Alarm Fire Rips Through East Baltimore Senior Center

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Raging Three-Alarm Fire Rips Through East Baltimore Senior Center

A newly constructed senior home sponsored by a church is burning in east Baltimore. The three-alarm blaze is not related to the violent protests that erupted across the city earlier today, according to a fire department spokesman who spoke with the Washington Post.

The fire raging through the reportedly vacant building is apparently so large it can currently be seen all over Baltimore.

ABC reports that local fire crews are currently responding to at least four separate fires.


Contact the author at gabrielle@gawker.com.


From Funeral to Riot: 7 Hours In Baltimore

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From Funeral to Riot: 7 Hours In Baltimore

Two police cars, a cruiser and a transport van, were on fire at the intersection of Baltimore’s North and Pennsylvania Avenues. Dozens of people poured out of a CVS on the same corner, arms full of toilet paper and baby wipes. An older man in a pageboy cap put his hand on my shoulder and walked with me for a few steps. “You’ve gotta get out of here,” he said. “These people are crazy. They want to hurt people who look like you.”

I stood there for a second, fumbling with my notebook, when a kid of about 13 or 14 wearing a gray facemask walked up and chimed in. “They’re not crazy; they’re survivalists. They’re trying to survive. This is the system they were put in.”

By the time I reached North and Pennsylvania—the epicenter of the riots, or at least, the epicenter of the riot I saw—the two cars were already on fire. (The CVS, which was burning as of 7 p.m. this evening, was being looted.) It was just after 5:00 pm, several hours after the close of the funeral service for Freddie Gray. The service had been held at New Shiloh Baptist Church several blocks away. Some of the congregated protesters were children; some were older; some wore red, blue, or black bandanas. Most I talked to were friendly and intent that no one be hurt.

From Funeral to Riot: 7 Hours In Baltimore

I stood several feet away from the flaming cars; they periodically made ominous popping and hissing sounds as tires deflated and small explosions went off, perhaps caused by ammunition catching fire and discharging. Though I didn’t witness it myself, a radio reporter I met said that one protester stole a shotgun from the back of the van and made off with it. The police, conspicuously inactive, stood in full riot gear further north on Pennsylvania and did not directly engage with the assembled protesters. By 7 p.m., after I left, that had changed; videos on Twitter showed a line of cops advancing on protesters outside the CVS and a clip from a different location showed officers using tear gas. An AP photographer captured police throwing rocks at protesters. There have been reports of injured officers, but I didn’t witness any clashes between protesters and police firsthand.

The impromptu group I was traveling with included a combination of reporters and protesters: Montrel Haygood, a soft-spoken Baltimorean of about 25 who offered to help me around; the aforementioned radio reporter Steve Dorsey; and two other locals.

While standing in the intersection of North and Penn, Dorsey had been punched in the face, apparently by a protester, and robbed of his iPhone. Immediately after he went down, I saw a group of protesters form a human shield around him, bringing him to his feet and helping him walk to safety. I didn’t actually meet Dorsey until several minutes later; Haygood and others had taken him under an awning on North, east of the burning cars, to recuperate from the hit. After Dorsey was jumped and another photographer was attacked by a teenager close by—Haygood broke up the scuffle before it became serious—we’d decided together that it was becoming too dangerous to stay. As we walked southward, away from the riot’s center, another group of three or four walked parallel to us across the street. Its leader had what looked like a pistol tucked into his waistband.

Dorsey gave me the keys to his car and told me to drive us to the headquarters of local CBS outlet WJZ, where he occasionally works. Last I spoke to Dorsey at around 6:30 p.m., he was on his way to nearby Sinai hospital with a possible dislocated knee. “I want to go to police headquarters,” he told me, eager to get back outside and begin reporting again.

From Funeral to Riot: 7 Hours In Baltimore

Another man I met, who lived in the neighborhood, expressed solidarity with the protesters’ cause but distaste with their methods. “I’m just a working class guy—a property manager. I have some properties on North Avenue. I did attend the demonstrations on Saturday, because I’ve been pulled over a few times, and the police treat me like shit every time I’m pulled over. But it shouldn’t be like this. All the right wingers—this is exactly what they want. Fox News, Breitbart. We look like hooligans.”

Shortly thereafter, as I stood on the sidewalk at the southeast corner of North and Penn, an older man shouted “There he is!” and chased a grade school kid who was rounding the corner. A small crowd formed, thinking it might have to prevent a bizarrely mismatched fight from breaking out, but it turned out that the man was the child’s father. Hearing that his child was messing around near the looting and the violence, he came and found him, scooped him up, and presumably brought him home to safety.


Top photo via AP. Inline photos by the author. Contact the author at andy@gawker.com.

Baltimore Cop Photographed Hurling a Rock at Protestors

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Baltimore Cop Photographed Hurling a Rock at Protestors

Pictured: a Baltimore police officer protesting the Baltimore protests (by hurling rocks at the protestors.)

[image via AP]


Contact the author at gabrielle@gawker.com.

Well, our friends at Ratter.com just officially launched Ratter Baltimore.

Tuna Company Charged Over Worker Cooked Alive With 6 Tons of Fish

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Tuna Company Charged Over Worker Cooked Alive With 6 Tons of Fish

On Monday, Bumble Bee Foods and two employees were charged with felony safety violations over the death of worker burned alive in an industrial pressure cooker, the Associated Press reports.

According to Los Angeles County prosecutors, the company, their director of plant operations and a former safety manager each face three counts of violating OSHA rules over the incident, which occurred in 2012. From the L.A. Times:

On Oct. 11, 2012, Jose Melena, 62, entered a 35-foot oven at the company’s Santa Fe Springs plant to make a repair inside the machine, which is used to sterilize thousands of cans of tuna at a time.

Unaware that Melena was inside the oven, other plant workers loaded several carts that altogether held about 12,000 pounds of tuna, shut the door and turned on the oven, prosecutors said.

Temperatures peaked at around 270 degrees, and Melena cooked to death, prosecutors said. His charred remains were found by another plant worker.

“We remain devastated by the loss of our colleague Jose Melena in the tragic accident,” Bumble Bee said in a statement on Monday. “We disagree with and are disappointed by the charges filed by the Los Angeles District Attorney’s Office.”

Prosecutors say the company could be fined as much as $1.5 million. In 2014, Bumble Bee Foods reportedly generated about $1 billion in sales.

[Image via CDC]

Why Is Gordon Ramsay Trying to Distance Himself From a Former Intern?

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Why Is Gordon Ramsay Trying to Distance Himself From a Former Intern?

A seemingly run-of-the-mill restaurant review for the Guardian unearthed a tense disagreement between Gordon Ramsay and a female chef who apparently worked in several of his restaurants over a two-year period.

Food writer Jay Rayner was working on a review of a London restaurant called Jinjuu when he accidentally stumbled across the food feud. Rayner was apparently attempting to verify head chef Judy Joo’s CV with Gordan Ramsay when things suddenly escalated.

Still, presumably Judy Joo knows her market. She began as an investment banker before swapping into the world of food and television. Her biography on her own website lists her two years working for Gordon Ramsay. Time spent at his flagship restaurant is mentioned again on the Jinjuu website. I ask Gordon Ramsay Holdings about her time with them. At this point it should be made clear that, from my subsequent enquiries, there is no doubt Joo did spend significant time working in the kitchens of the group, albeit mostly on an unpaid basis.

Which makes the Gordan Ramsay Holdings response all the more bizarre. You’d think I’d accused them of drowning kittens. Managing director Stuart Gillies told me that Joo was only given part-time experience as a gesture of goodwill at Restaurant Gordon Ramsay in the pastry section, that they have no records of employment for her in any of their other restaurants, and that at no point did Gordon Ramsay himself train her (which was not something she’d ever claimed). Gillies went on to accuse her angrily of being economical with the truth on her personal website.

Sounds like someone really wanted to convey the impression that Joo was a) a liar or b) had little or no contact with Ramsay. Why he wanted to convey that impression is unclear, and Rayner isn’t able to figure out why. But, Rayner writes, Joo’s claims checked out.

Blimey. I was only looking for a bit of background. I put all this to Joo by email. I thought she might call me. I’d have liked that. After all, we met a few years ago. She even asked me for advice on getting into British food media. Instead her lawyers send me a 17-page letter denying everything that Gordon Ramsay Holdings said. She had worked for up to five days a week for over two years in many of his restaurants, mostly as an unpaid intern, they say, including three months at Pétrus. She’d also worked with Jason Atherton at Maze and elsewhere within the group.

The letter includes multiple pages of testimonials. In just 36 hours, Joo’s team has solicited responses from around the world. There are statements in support of her from Chantelle Nicholson, operations director for Marcus Wareing, a testimonial from Jason Atherton and later even one from Mark Askew and Simone Zanoni, two ex-head chefs of Ramsay’s flagship restaurant. All are clear: Joo had spent an awful lot of time in the kitchens of Gordon Ramsay’s restaurants. Zanoni referred to her as a true pleasure and a great asset to the team.

Not exactly the dishwasher Ramsay’s team tried to portray her as. So what’s with the contradicting stories and team of lawyers? Pretty intense reactions over a restaurant that’s just “OK if you like that sort of thing.”

[h/t BoingBoing, image via AP]


Contact the author at gabrielle@gawker.com.

Michael Jackson-Impersonating Protester to Police: Just Beat It

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Just beat it, beat it, beat it, beat it
No one wants to be defeated
Showin’ how funky and strong is your fight
It doesn’t matter who’s wrong or right
Just beat it, beat it [x4]

Some parts of Baltimore appear to be quieting down for the night.

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Some parts of Baltimore appear to be quieting down for the night. On a 15 minute drive from Woodberry to Mount Vernon—where at least some looting happened earlier this evening—I didn’t see a single other car or person on the street. According to CNN, the area surrounding North and Pennsylvania Avenues is still active.


Freight Train Got Blown Right Off a Bridge

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A freight train passing through New Orleans was no match for a powerful storm in what was at once a potentially dangerous accident and also a terrific metaphor for a country song.

As the train rolled across the Huey P. Long Bridge at a reported 4 mph, strong gusts of wind blew at least four cars off the track, sending them crashing onto the ground.

Due to the severe weather this morning, four Union Pacific Railroad railcars derailed and dropped off the east bank approach to the Huey P. Long Bridge,” Jeff Davis, New Orleans Public Belt general manager said in a statement. “The rail cars were empty and did not contain any hazardous materials. No leaks and no injuries are reported at this time.”

Just a nice, dependable country freight train who proved no match for the whims of a wild hurricane. Man, this song practically writes itself.


Contact the author at gabrielle@gawker.com.

2 Dead, 4 Wounded After Drive-By Shooting Outside Brooklyn Church

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2 Dead, 4 Wounded After Drive-By Shooting Outside Brooklyn Church

Six people were shot and two died after gunmen opened fire on mourners leaving a funeral in Brooklyn Monday night, the New York Daily News reports. According to witnesses, as many as 15 shots were fired from a silver SUV into the crowd gathered outside Emmanuel Church of God in East Flatbush.

“It sounded like a war ... boom, boom, boom,” a witness told the paper. “I ran. I went inside my business. After that, the police came.”

Police say the victims are all believed to have attended the funeral of 38-year-old Jose Louis Robles, who died of a heart attack earlier this month. From The New York Times:

Mr. Robles, a father of two who lived in Brooklyn, was known as Cheo. He died on April 16. An obituary included in a flier from the service described him as having overcome “many obstacles” and said that he was 60 credits away from a degree in neuroscience from Manhattan College. Mr. Marroquin, a close friend of Mr. Robles, said in an interview early Tuesday morning that Mr. Robles had served time in prison for murder. “He got married in that church, he changed his life 100 percent. He left the streets. He left the life. Right now, a war started. This is a war.”

A cousin of Mr. Robles’s, who asked to be identified only as Hazel, said she was in shock. “I’m just trying to piece this together,” she said. “He was a very beautiful person. He was 38. He died of natural causes. He fell asleep. It was nothing gang related. That’s why this is very surprising.”

Authorities described one shooter as a Hispanic male in his 20s wearing a Yankees cap and a white T-shirt. As of 10 p.m., no suspects had been arrested.

UPDATE 2:20 a.m.: According to the Daily News, one of the wounded is believed to be a one of the gunmen, injured when a funeral attendee shot back. A police source told the paper that the shooters were rivals of the gang Robles used to be a member of.

[Image via AP Images]

"English Only, USA!" Chants Dumb Guy Ejected From Kindergarten Concert

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What’s the best venue for your self-righteous, nativist ravings? If you answered “my 6-year-old’s school concert, of course,” then congratulations, fuckwit, everyone hates you.

On Thursday, just such a fuckwit was booted from a kindergarten performance in Perry, Iowa after loudly chanting, “English only, USA!” when the event’s Spanish interpreter began to speak. The audience’s reaction, which you can watch above, was immediate and unanimous.

“Uggggggh,” agreed everybody as school staff hauled the dope away.

“‘Murrrica!” one concertgoer added.

[h/t Reddit]

AT&T Billed an Elderly Man $24,000 for Using AOL Dial-Up

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AT&T Billed an Elderly Man $24,000 for Using AOL Dial-Up

An 83-year-old Los Angeles man couldn’t believe the bills AT&T kept sending him for his simple landline phone account—more than $24,000 over two months. But the company insisted he had to pay it, even though it seemed impossible that dialing up to AOL—the only thing he really used the line for—could cost that much.

With no other recourse, the embattled AT&T customer, Ron Dorff, contacted the L.A. Times. He told his story to reporter David Lazarus, who ended up investigating this Comcast-level customer service catastrophe.

Dorff told Lazarus he mostly uses the phone line for his AOL dial-up internet service. That may sound strange, but more than 2 million people are still subscribed to AOL dial-up—many of them elderly, impoverished, or residents of rural areas without viable broadband options.

Dorff, who is retired and collects Social Security, said his typical monthly phone bill from AT&T was $51, so he was surprised to see it jump to $8,596.57 in March. He told Lazarus he called AT&T, and they promised to send a technician to figure out the problem.

No one came, and AT&T added another $15,687 to his bill in April.

When the company finally got a technician out, they said it was a problem with his modem, but refused to lower the insane $24,000 bill that had accumulated as a result.

Of course, they were happy to fix the problem once they got a call about it from a Los Angeles Times reporter, and claimed they’d never intended to make poor Mr. Dorff pay that huge bill anyway.

They couldn’t explain why their system didn’t flag a five-figure charge for a basic landline, just waved it away as a “rare occurrence.” Seems like a $24,000 landline bill should be a “never” occurrence, but I’m not a major telecom company, so what do I know?

[h/t BroBible, Photo: AP Images]

Baltimore’s 12 O’Clock Boys Stop by the Protests

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Baltimore’s 12 O’Clock Boys Stop by the Protests

The 12 O’Clock Boys, an infamous group of Baltimoreans who ride dirt bikes and four wheelers throughout the city, stopped by the protests at North and Pennsylvania Avenues today and treated the crowd to several sick wheelies. The anchors narrating the telecast on WBAL were not amused.

“Here would be my suggestion, now we have identified that they are out there, I would suggest that we not give them any more attention because they thrive on it,” anchor Stan Stovall says in the second video below. “Bikers will see this and they’re going to want to join them. ‘Hey we can get on TV too.’ Maybe we should stop focusing on them and start paying attention to the positives.”

I don’t know. For a town that’s gone through as much as Baltimore has in the past 24 hours, a set of apparently crowd-awing tricks from a group representing a segment of the city’s unique culture is probably a nice morale booster.

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