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Sam Simon, The Simpsons Co-Creator, Dead at 59

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Sam Simon, The Simpsons Co-Creator, Dead at 59

Sam Simon, the comedy producer who co-created The Simpsons and wrote for Taxi and Cheers, died on Sunday after a two-year battle with cancer. He was 59.

Born in 1955, Simon began his career writing for Fat Albert and the Cosby Kids in 1979; two years later, James L. Brooks hired him as a a showrunner on Taxi, when Simon was just 26. He also wrote for Cheers, It's Garry Shandling's Show, and The Tracey Ullman Show, where many of the Simpsons characters first appeared.

In 1993, four years after the show's debut, Simon left The Simpsons, in part because of disagreements with co-creator Matt Groening. In The Simpsons: An Uncensored, Unauthorized History, Groening described Simon as "brilliantly funny and one of the smartest writers I've ever worked with, although unpleasant and mentally unbalanced." Simon attributed their rift to a comment he made early on about the show probably being "thirteen and out," or canceled after one season, which Groening apparently interpreted as a lack of commitment from Simon.

Despite his brief time on staff, Simon is credited with giving The Simpsons much of its creative direction, in large part because of the legendary writing team—including Conan O'Brien, George Meyer, John Swartzwelder, Al Jean, Jon Vitti, and Mike Reiss—that he hired.

Since being diagnosed with incurable colon cancer in February 2013, Simon has donated most of his fortune—The Simpsons reportedly made him hundreds of millions of dollars—to PETA (which renamed their headquarters The Sam Simon Center in his honor), Save the Children, the Sea Shepherd Conservation Society, and other charities around the world.

[Image via AP]


Contact the author at taylor@gawker.com.


The Regular Person's Guide To The Apple Watch 

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The Regular Person's Guide To The Apple Watch 

There's some Steve Jobs understudy shit going on today, as you've probably seen. Our friends at Gizmodo have a very full and technical explanation of what happened today. But if you don't really care about tech specs and just want to know if this stuff is good or bullshit, we've got something for you.

Apple Watch

Should you buy this thing? HAHA NO! The Apple Watch is a niche gadget for nerds who really want to playact '70s science fiction scenarios. You can use this thing to check into hotels and as your room key, to check weather, check Twitter or airline info, or ask Siri about the temperature—all things that are MUCH easier to do on your phone, where you aren't at the mercy of tiny little watchface controls and spray-and-pray voice control. This is a thing you buy if you are willing to spend hundreds of dollars to solve a problem whose previous solution was reaching into your fucking pocket and taking out your phone.

Or more succinctly: WHY WOULD YOU WANT TO USE INSTAGRAM ON YOUR WATCH? THE PHOTOS ARE ALREADY SMALL AS SHIT.

Of course, you could have said all this before today and of basically all smart watches. Anything cool about Apple's Apple Watch watch? (Great name, assholes.) HAHA NO! The most unique thing this watch has is the ability to tap the screen and make your friend's watch buzz. Great. Apple Watch: The ultimate tool for trolling friends until they take off their $500 watch, and I guess a pathetic if halfway-effective sex toy stand-in. This is more useful for the kids standing lookout in The Wire than it is for a human being.

Can you get away with wearing it?

The fashion crowd has pretty much settled on this thing being okay as a watch you're seen wearing around, which is fine but probably reliant on more fashion fluency than the average Apple Watch buyer has. But that's for wearing it, not using it. Using it is going to be you, hunched down squinting at a watch face, flicking widgets around like you're trying to molest them. Did I mention you can do all this shit on your phone? Which you already have?

The Regular Person's Guide To The Apple Watch 

More functionality and sex appeal than the Apple Watch

That fucking price

Oh, and the price. This thing costs anywhere from $350 to $1100 in standard configurations, which include 42mm and 38mm sizes, and some 32k 18k gold bullshit. To put this into context, here's a brief, recent history: As smartphones shifted from luxury to standard issue, a company called Vertu rose to some prominence in gadget circles. It charged exorbitant prices for phones that were gold-plated and inlaid with gems. (You can buy a $12,500 red alligator phone here.) Everyone made fun of this as a concept because phones are deliberately ephemeral; you get rid of them every few years. Software and its attendant hardware requirements move on and you're given a subsidy to replace the old model and get the new one. Ruby-inlaid phones are for fucking psychopaths with an oil fortune or something. You can pay $1000 for a watch if you have the money and don't have anything better to do with it, but spending $1000 for a watch you will have to replace in a year or two is fucking insane. A $1000 disposable watch is what happens when a bubble-laden cul-de-sac in northern California is usurped by a bald maniac in the back seat of a Bentley and his Baby Gap t-shirts cut off bloodflow to his brain. There's also a configuration that costs $17,000*.

Anything else, dickheads?

What else should you know? The "all-day" and "18-hour" battery life stuff is probably not true, and it's more like 5 hours of using it often, and like all batteries—like your fucking iPhone that was basically okay when you got it, but now, maybe 15 months later, drains something like 13 percent reading one article and barely makes it through an evening out even if you charged it at your desk at work—it will decay over time. You'll have email on your wrist, because your pocket was too far away from your face to cause a reflexive anxiety panic. You can use a fucking Mickey Mouse watch face, or tell time by watching rose petals move, or something. You can take calls. You can send drawings of your heartbeat to your friends. You can get all the notifications.

There are also some videos about how cool the materials are, meaning Apple used some very cool aluminium and steel—way cooler than regular aluminium or steel. (Generally, talking about materials is something you do when you've made something really awesome and you want to explain how you did it, not for when you made a fucking gold-plated double decker couch.)

Are the materials really as pure and delightful as the ads say? Fuck, I don't know, maybe they are. Maybe John Goodman's sphincter tastes like gourmet peanut brittle. Kind of beside the larger point, in both cases.

Anyway, probably don't buy this thing.

The Regular Person's Guide To The Apple Watch 

MacBook

Oh yeah, Apple made a new MacBook. It's thinner, and it comes in gold now because the downfall of great nations is often gilded in golden luxuries. Basically, this is a computer for people who already have a computer on which they can do Work, but want a second, luxury computer on which to, I don't know, read some blog posts? It's a computer for people who want to use their computer for things that they might also use an iPad for, but in computer form.

The main thing is that this computer is smaller than the old MacBook Airs, which are already very small, and comes with a retina screen, which I am sure is very nice. It's got a new keyboard that Apple says is better to type on (but appears to have a shallower key press, so that will probably be down to taste), a clickier trackpad, and through a series of technical contortions like dense circuitry and the removal of a fan, it runs very quiet.

The Regular Person's Guide To The Apple Watch 

But the thing you should pay attention to is the processor, which is an Intel Core M Broadwell CPU. What does this mean? Basically, this is a slower processor that you'd usually see in a tablet or other mobile or hybrid computer, which means the new MacBook is deliberately hamstrung so that it can get longer battery life (and stay cool enough to not need that fan). It's possible that this is fine, but the last time Apple made a new computer that was smaller and prettier and more expensive and less powerful than its other computers was the original MacBook Air, which was impressive technically but also garbage to use. There is a point of Good Enough in technology, where the excess of Tech Specs can be trimmed back to make something more efficient and usable, but with the bumps Apple made to the MacBook Air—a computer on which you can do Work—you can guess that for now Apple just sees this thing as a very pretty iPad Keyboard Case. Yours starting at $1300 or $1600! Probably don't buy this, either.

Top image via Getty; Super Mario 3 watch image via Gallery Hip

500 Days of Kristin, Day 43: A Pipe Dream Starring Meredith Vieira

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500 Days of Kristin, Day 43: A Pipe Dream Starring Meredith Vieira

Kristin Cavallari, whose debut book Balancing on Heels drops in 457 days, stopped by The Meredith Vieira Show today to promote not her book, but the idea of Kristin in general. Meredith Vieira, who is currently trailing Dr. Phil, Wendy Williams, and Steve Harvey in the daytime talk show ratings, welcomed her.

No doubt the two communed deeply in front of the studio audience, covering everything from historical trends in the Belarusian economy email scandal to Kristin's line of mid-priced shoes for Chinese Laundry, but we don't have to discuss all of that today. Since Vieira's show is apparently suffering so much as to require Kristin's appearance on it, we will dedicate the whole week to drawing attention to the event, as a humanitarian effort.

That's right: It's Meredith Vieira Week on 500 Days of Kristin. Meredith WEEK-eira. A one-week meditation on two gals forever linked by their fading personal brands and the opposite-colored piping on their office-appropriate ensembles.

What do you think Kristin thought when she first shook hands with Meredith backstage and realized what she was wearing? My guess is "fuck."


This has been 500 Days of Kristin.

[Photo via Getty]

io9 The Moral Philosophy of Calvin and Hobbes | Jalopnik Why C.J.

10 Terrible Movies That Absolutely Everyone Should See

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10 Terrible Movies That Absolutely Everyone Should See

Sometimes you can learn more from a bad movie than a good one. And certain atrocious films have become cultural touchstones, influencing generations of creators and spawning endless memes. So here are 10 really awful science fiction and fantasy movies that everybody should watch at least once.

1) Dragonball Evolution

We recently rewatched this film, at the io9 fortress of media omnivorousness, and it's actually much worse than we remembered. It's so terrible, that it ought to be taught in film schools all over the world. Not just as an example of how not to translate a beloved artifact from another culture into a Western context, or turning animation into live-action, but also just as an example of squandered potential. Chow Yun-Fat brings so much good nature and zaniness to this film, and the rest of the cast tries their best. But what absolutely kills this movie dead is the lack of a strong villain — James Marsters, encased in latex, can barely move or speak, and he's only on screen for about five minutes. And the fact that it simultaneously takes a dump on the anime's mythos and also lectures you about it, simultaneously. When Goku starts turning into Oozaru at the end, you'll have no clue what that's supposed to mean, but you'll be very annoyed.

2) The Lovely Bones

10 Terrible Movies That Absolutely Everyone Should See

Continuing the theme of terrible adaptations — in our imaginary film-school class, Peter Jackson's The Lovely Bones would be shown back-to-back with Guillermo del Toro's Pan's Labyrinth. Because they're both movies about young girls confronting unimaginable horrors, and seeing through the lens of fantasy. (Except of course, the girl in The Lovely Bones is dead, and the fantasy is her version of the afterlife.) And The Lovely Bones fails for all the reasons that Pan's Labyrinth succeeds — the fantasy stuff has no real weight to it, in Jackson's version. It doesn't bring its own terrible darkness, or provide a thematic counterweight, the way it does for del Toro. And Jackson is a great filmmaker, at the height of his powers, using exquisite CG animation to depict a candy-coated afterlife that's way less important in the book — and you wind up with the sense that Jackson has been seduced by beauty into abandoning coherent storytelling. Or maybe, that he's convinced himself that enough giant butterflies will make some grand statement about innocence surviving after an unthinkable crime. The Lovely Bones is a great cautionary statement for anyone who's gotten carried away — not just with the promise of technology, but also with some grand vision that has no weight to it.

3) Spider-Man 3 and X-Men: The Last Stand

10 Terrible Movies That Absolutely Everyone Should See

These "threequels" are among the worst superhero films of all time. They're not just bad, they're milestones of terribleness, and you probably ought to see them purely because of their importance in geek culture. But they also provide a vitally important object lesson, in this era of pervasive superhero films. They're both bad, in large part, because they try to cram in too many comics storylines into a single film. Spider-Man 3 wants to do the Venom saga, introduce Gwen Stacy, show Harry Osborn becoming the Green Goblin, introduce Sandman, and cover a half-dozen other bases. And it does so with supreme half-assedness. Meanwhile, X3 tackles Joss Whedon's "Gifted" storyline about a mutant cure. Plus the Dark Phoenix storyline. Plus a whole lot of other stuff, that should have had a lot more breathing space. Neither of these films respects the material they're working with, which doesn't help. Given that Whedon's second Avengers film is about to handle Ultron, Scarlet Witch, Vision and a few other odds and ends, it's worth seeing a reminder of what happens when a movie tries to encompass too many iconic stories at once.

4) Plan 9 From Outer Space

10 Terrible Movies That Absolutely Everyone Should See

One of the main reasons why a bad movie might become required viewing is if it's acquired cult status, and become part of our shared pop-culture heritage. And if it's "so bad it's good," or so incredibly awful that it becomes unstoppably funny and bizarrely fascinating, pushing the limits of artistic expression in ways that a good movie never can. Like we wrote a few years ago, "A truly horrendous movie can make you feel like you're seeing the face of God. And then it melts!" Or, as Jim Steinman says in the Meat Loaf biopic, "If you don't go over the top, how will you see what's on the other side?" And this thriller, made by notorious B-movie maven Ed Wood, is considered by many critics and film enthusiasts to be the worst movie ever made. Hilariously low-budget, riddled with continuity errors, featuring a baldly absurd (some would say amazing) plot, and amateurish to a fault, it's a case study in how not to make a film. And yet, it's possibly the best and most representative example of "so bad it's good" movie-making, with its insane camp. And you can't help coming a way with a lot of respect for the sheer chutzpah of its creator and his DIY determination. Ed Wood set out to make a movie with just a shoestring budget and some dime-store props and by God, he made one.

5) Highlander 2: The Quickening

10 Terrible Movies That Absolutely Everyone Should See

An incomprehensible sequel that appears to have almost nothing to do with the original film, Highlander 2 sees Connor MacLeod still pottering around New York in 2024, only now he's graduated from pro wrestling fan to opera buff. The world is in bad shape, the ozone layer has been destroyed, and an evil corporation controls the shield that keeps everyone alive. Oh, and the immortals turn out to be alien exiles from the planet Zeist. A lot of Highlander fans prefer to pretend this movie doesn't even exist — but it's worth watching as a lesson in how not to undo the mythology of one film by over-explaining it in the next. The original Highlander is a B-movie gem whose cheesy trappings don't undercut the essential simplicity of its premise. The origin of the immortals is never explained to us and that is as it should be. The sequel annihilates that mystery and replaces it with banality by positing the half-baked Zeist theory.

6) The Core

10 Terrible Movies That Absolutely Everyone Should See

Along with films like Armageddon and 2012, The Core has come to symbolize terrible science in movies. When scientists from NASA and elsewhere list their most loathed films in terms of representations of science, they always pick on The Core. The whole premise is kind of amazing: the Earth's core stops spinning, screwing up the magnetic field, and the planet will die unless a team of scientists travels to the center of the Earth in a special vehicle and nukes it. Along the way, they dodge ginormous diamonds. The Core is not just unscientific, it's joyfully so. And it's kind of a special pleasure watching a cast that includes Aaron Eckhart, Bruce Greenwood and Hilary Swank spout nonsense dialogue and attempt to take completely ridiculous situations seriously. This movie is like Ground Zero for awful science, and even Roland Emmerich can't believe he didn't direct it — so if you miss out on it, you'll be left out of a lot of conversations about the most idiotic science in movies. Plus, and I cannot stress this enough, this movie is a special kind of insane fun.

7) Star Wars Episode I: The Phantom Menace

10 Terrible Movies That Absolutely Everyone Should See

Even more than the Matrix sequels or Terminator Salvation or whatever, this Star Wars prequel was a colossal letdown. The long-awaited film turned out to be an undercooked, overplotted mess of empty pixels and stiff acting. Minus points for creating, in Jar Jar Binks, the most annoying character in the franchise. And yet, it's a central point in geek mythos, a movie that everybody has opinions about. And with the Expanded Universe no longer in continuity, the entire Star Wars universe — which is continuing in full force with Rebels and a slew of upcoming movies — starts with this film. You can't know Star Wars without studying this movie. Plus there's the fact that Phantom Menace has spawned an entire cottage industry of film criticism, from Mr. Plinkett to everyone else. People have analyzed every frame of this movie for its secrets of terribleness, and you won't even understand a big chunk of the internet without seeing it.

8) Maleficent

10 Terrible Movies That Absolutely Everyone Should See

And now, for a change of pace, here's a terrible movie that actually succeeds. As in, it was a box office success, but also it's kind of beloved. And it's purely thanks to two things: 1) Angelina Jolie's magnetic, radiant performance, and 2) the fact that the movie gives her character a clear through-line and emotional arc. Maleficent does pretty much nothing right — it fails in its stated aim of telling the story of a great Disney villain, because it undercuts everything that made her a great villain in the first place. It gives her a backstory that feels horribly violating and brings up the spectre of rape. It has an inconsistent tone, vacillating between cutesy fairies and gothic darkness, and feels as though nobody was quite in control over the legion of VFX artists who put the thing together. The storyline is horribly unsatisfying, and does a disservice to its source material and to the audience. The rest of the cast, especially Sharlto Copley, seems not to know what the hell they're doing. But it still kind of comes together, around Angelina Jolie.

9) Lawnmower Man

10 Terrible Movies That Absolutely Everyone Should See

The #1 reason to see this film is because it has aged so very badly. It's an object of fascination to see something that might — might — have been considered cutting-edge in 1992, and now looks so incredibly terrible. This is a thriller about a scientist who decides to enhance his groundskeeper's intelligence with virtual reality tech and some choice drugs, very loosely based on a Stephen King novel. Its story makes no sense and its special effects are laughable today, making it the anti-Terminator 2 as a showcase of early CGI. So for one thing, Lawnmower Man is an object lesson in the dangers inherent in relying too heavily on 'cutting edge' technology as a replacement for storytelling, instead of leveraging the tech in the service of great stories and characters. But it's also a fascinating glimpse of early movie CGI, which is so fake-looking and disturbingly weird that it becomes a different kind of art form. In much the same way that 1990s CG space battles are beautiful, there's a weird beauty to this movie's dated effects and "cyber" storytelling. It's very much of its time, and it shows us how we got to where we are now.

10) Maximum Overdrive

10 Terrible Movies That Absolutely Everyone Should See

Stephen King might just be the most filmed genre author of all time — but this is his directorial debut, showing us just how King thinks his work should be filmed. As Roadtrippers explained:

For all the terrible acting and terrible directing, you still can't help but love this movie.Maximum Overdrive has all the big explosions, deranged scenes, AC/DC tunes and variety of vehicles to redeem it from its lack of, well, everything else.

King's adaptation of his short story "Truckers," this gem is all about inanimate objects becoming murderously sentient after the Earth passes through the tail of a comet. It makes no sense. And given how much King dominates pop culture nowadays, it's worth watching, just to see how his horror sensibilities translate to the screen when he's adapting them himself — and why he fails where a number of others succeeded.

State Judge to Take Over Ferguson Cases After Damning DOJ Report

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State Judge to Take Over Ferguson Cases After Damning DOJ Report

On Monday, the Supreme Court of Missouri announced that all of Ferguson's current municipal cases will be transferred to a state appeals judge in order to "help restore public trust and confidence," the Associated Press reports.

The move comes in the wake of last week's scathing Justice Department report which, among other troubling revelations, concluded that the Ferguson court was "constitutionally deficient" and acted "not with the primary goal of administering justice or protecting the rights of the accused, but of maximizing revenue."

According to today's announcement, the reassignment will begin next Monday and remain in effect until the state supreme court orders otherwise.

Arguing that "extraordinary action" was needed, Chief Justice Mary R. Russell said Judge Roy L. Richter of the Missouri Court of Appeals will bring "a fresh, disinterested perspective to this court's practices and he is able and willing to implement needed reforms."

In its report, the Department of Justice outlined a number of alarming practices Ferguson's municipal court used to "advance the city's financial interests." From the St. Louis Post-Dispatch:

The report said the city set defendants up to fail by requiring them to appear at a specific place and time to pay citations. Ferguson police officers frequently provided wrong information about when to appear in court, and the in-person appearance requirement "imposes particular difficulties on low-wage workers, single parents and those with limited access to reliable transportation."

[Image via State of Missouri]

Oswald Biographer Challenges O'Reilly's "Reality Deficient" JFK Story

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Oswald Biographer Challenges O'Reilly's "Reality Deficient" JFK Story

Today, investigative journalist Edward Jay Epstein disputed a dramatic anecdote from Bill O'Reilly's 2012 book Killing Kennedy, writing a point-by-point refutation of the Fox News host's story titled "O'Reilly's JFK Reporting Was Impossible. I Know Because I Was There."

In the book, O'Reilly claimed to have been standing outside the Florida home where Lee Harvey Oswald associate George de Mohrenschildt killed himself, hearing the gunshot firsthand, an account questioned by the website JFKFacts.org in 2013 and further interrogated by Media Matters last month.

Epstein, however, has unique expertise on the topic as the author of Legend: The Secret World of Lee Harvey Oswald and, by his own account, "the actual—and only—reporter interviewing de Mohrenschildt on the last day of his life in 1977."

Accusing O'Reilly of "reality deficiency disorder," Epstein offered a number of key details that differ from the Killing Kennedy story, including the location of the suicide and the audibility of the gunshot.

Additionally, Epstein pointed to audio tapes that purportedly show O'Reilly was in Dallas on the date of de Mohrenschildt's death, including a phone call where investigator Gaeton Fonzi seems to inform O'Reilly of the suicide.

In the essay, Epstein offers an imaginative theory as to how the Fox News host could have been in both Florida and Texas at once:

In his 2012 account, the inventive O'Reilly may have been emulating the time-traveling investigator Jake Epping, who went back in time to solve the JFK assassination in Stephen King's 2011 best-selling book 11/22/63. Epping in that book used time travel to drop in on George de Mohrenschildt before he killed himself. But of course Epping's feat was pure fiction.

On his show Monday, O'Reilly briefly addressed Epstein's claims, dismissing it as another "far-left attack" on his reporting and pointing to a statement from former colleague Bob Sirkin that—while not directly addressing the gunshot story—states, "It remains preposterous for anyone to claim that O'Reilly and I were not in Florida before, during, and following de Mohrenschildt's death."

[Image via AP Images//h/t Mediaite]

50 Cent's Toddler Son Gets $700,000 Modeling Contract, 50 Cent Reports

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50 Cent's Toddler Son Gets $700,000 Modeling Contract, 50 Cent Reports

According to prolific Instagram troll 50 Cent, his 2-year-old son Sire recently landed a $700,000 modeling deal, a dollar amount roughly equivalent to 1.4 million his dads.

The rapper—who, let's be honest, might not be the most reliable source when it comes to information about 50 Cent—gave that figure during an interview last week with Power 105.1 FM's Angie Martinez.

After the radio host suggested his son was "model cute," 50 excitedly replied, "He actually got a deal!" adding, "They paying a big payment too: 700."

While at first it seemed 50 might have been using a more reasonable unit for a child's salary than thousands of dollars (like, say, Cheerios), he later clarified that Sire was getting "700,000 to be the face" of headphone maker Kidz Safe.

"He's super cute!" explained the rapper, which, I guess, fair enough.

[Image via Instagram//h/t NY Daily News]


Buffalo to Bread Lady: "Hey, Wanna Make Out?"

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Buffalo to Bread Lady: "Hey, Wanna Make Out?"

"Sup, girl?" asked a creeper buffalo during one woman's recent trip to a Washington wildlife park, adding, "Is that bread you got there? Cool. Wanna French?"

"This buffalo chased and licked us while feeding him and the other deer in the park," filmer Caroline Walker Evans later wrote of the encounter.

"Whatever," the buffalo presumably responded. "Your bread was gross anyway."

[Image via YouTube//h/t Daily Dot]

Racist Oklahoma Frat's House Mom Filmed Chanting Racist Slurs 

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In a 2013 Vine discovered by the University of Oklahoma's student newspaper, a seemingly intoxicated Sigma Alpha Epsilon house mother chants "nigger, nigger, nigger" along to Trinidad James' "All Gold Everything."http://gawker.com/sae-frat-bros-...

Ironically, the Oklahoma Daily identified Beauton Gilbow, 79, by comparing the Vine to her picture featured in a GoFundMe campaign started for her support after SAE national opted to close the school's chapter and suspend all its members for a racist video leaked Sunday. (The GoFundMe was apparently deleted after the Vine surfaced Monday night.)

Earlier Monday, Gilbow was interviewed, along with former OU head coach Barry Switzer, by KWTV about whether she had known about the racist song depicted in the leaked video:

"I don't know what I'm doing. I mean, I'm in shock," Beauton Gilbow, the SAE House Mother said.

"Did you ever get any indication there was anything like this going on?" News 9's Kelly Ogle asked.

"No, no, no. Never heard the song," Gilbow responded.

[H/T NY Daily News]


Contact the author at aleksander@gawker.com .

Deadspin Three Mississippi State Football Players Jumped At Waka Flocka Concert | Gizmodo The New Ma

Cops: Chicago Grandmother Cut Baby's Throat With Power Saw

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Cops: Chicago Grandmother Cut Baby's Throat With Power Saw

A 7-month-old baby girl was found dead Monday morning in Chicago's Little Village neighborhood after her throat was apparently cut with a circular power saw, Chicago's ABC7 reports.

Police say the girl's 52-year-old grandmother apparently killed her because she wouldn't stop crying. Charges are reportedly pending against her, and she's currently being held at Mt. Sinai Hospital with self-inflicted wounds after an apparent suicide attempt.

Neighbors said that a couple lived in the home with two grown daughters who each had a baby, and they didn't seem to be having any family problems. The Department of Child and Family Services had never been involved with the family, the AP reported.

A family member, possibly one of the daughters, found the baby and grandmother around 10 a.m.

"When I came out I heard a young lady in front of the door, and she was crying, 'When am I going to see my mom?' or something like that," a neighbor told ABC7.

[Photo: ABC7]

NYC Jail Doctor Ordered Inmate to Throw Severed Finger in Garbage: Suit

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NYC Jail Doctor Ordered Inmate to Throw Severed Finger in Garbage: Suit

In June, a Manhattan Detention Complex inmate named Rudolph Richardson was using the bathroom in his cell when a guard shut an electronic door on his left middle finger, partially severing it. Richardson sought medical attention, which he found in the form of a doctor who ordered him to throw his own finger in the trash, according to a lawsuit.

The complaint, reported on DNAinfo and Firedoglake, was filed in a Manhattan federal court in January. DNAinfo gives the awful details:

Dr. Landis Barnes, an employee of the city's jail health contractor, Corizon,briefly looked at Richardson's hand and told him the finger could not be saved.

"Incredibly, Dr. Barnes informed Richardson that he should throw the detached portion of his finger in the garbage," the complaint says.

Richardson refused and asked for ice or a solution to preserve his finger, according to the complaint.

"Dr. Barnes reluctantly fulfilled this request," the complaint says.

Richardson demanded that his wound be properly wrapped so the bleeding would slow. He then asked to fill out an incident report, and was held in a locked room after he filled it out.

Ultimately, Richardson was taken to Bellevue Hospital, where his finger was reattached.

Corizon, the Tennessee-based for-profit company that handles medical care for all New York City jails, has a history of malpractice and abuse, and complaints against it have recently become harder for the city to ignore. This year, the family of a teenaged Rikers inmate who died of a torn aorta and was prescribed nothing more than hand cream has sued the company, as has the family of a father who bled to death after his ulcer allegedly went untreated by Corizon's doctors.

But civil action isn't likely to make Corizon's behavior change: The provider's $400 million contracts with the city contain an indemnification clause protecting it from malpractice lawsuits, meaning if the mourning families win their cases, it will be taxpayers handing over money, not Corizon.

Fortunately, change may be on the way: At a City Council hearing last week, several councilmembers reamed Corizon out over inmate deaths, and a representative of the health department told DNAinfo that the city is pursuing other healthcare options. Corizon's contracts are up at the end of the year.

Photo via Canadian Pacific/Flickr. Contact the author at andy@gawker.com.

Ben Stiller and Owen Wilson Went Full Zoolander at Paris Fashion Week

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Attendees at last night's Valentino show got a welcome respite from Paris Fashion Week's endless parade of really, really, ridiculously good-looking models: Ben Stiller and Owen Wilson strutting down the runway in full Zoolander/Hansel mode. [Billy Zane voice] It's a walk off! It's a walk off.

No fun thing can come without an attached marketing campaign, and according to various entertainment outlets, the stunt was meant to promote the forthcoming Zoolander 2. David Bowie was apparently unavailable to officiate the proceedings.


Contact the author at andy@gawker.com.

How Reddit Became a Worse Black Hole of Violent Racism than Stormfront

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How Reddit Became a Worse Black Hole of Violent Racism than Stormfront

One section of the Web forum is dedicated to watching black men die, while another is called "CoonTown" and features users wondering if there are any states left that are "nigger free." One conversation focuses on the state of being "Negro Free," while another is about how best to bring attention to the assertion that black people are more prone to commit sexual assaults than whites.

But these discussions aren't happening on Stormfront, which since its founding in 1995 by a former Alabama Klan leader has been the largest hate forum on the Web. They're taking place on Reddit, a huge online bulletin board owned by mass media giant Condé Nast, which also owns Vanity Fair, The New Yorker and 20 other print and online publications that reach an estimated 95 million consumers. Reddit has been hailed as the last bastion of free speech on the Internet, an unregulated and vibrant community of users who post whatever they want and rely on the community around them to police their content.

The world of online hate, long dominated by website forums like Stormfront and its smaller neo-Nazi rival Vanguard News Network (VNN), has found a new — and wildly popular — home on the Internet. Reddit boasts the 9th highest Alexa Internet traffic ranking in the United States and the 36th worldwide. Many of Reddit's racist subreddits are among its most popular.

Reddit is a news site that hosts user-submitted links and discussion, organized into specific communities of interest comprised of "subreddits," which are ranked by votes from users. If a reader believes content is a constructive contribution, he or she can "upvote" it, pushing the content further up the page. Conversely, if a user thinks that content is either off-topic or is not constructive, it can be "downvoted," causing it to sink further down the page.

Content on Reddit is "moderated based on quality, not opinion," according to the working document that dictates community guidelines, called "Reddiquette." This idea of user-policed communities that contain high-quality, diverse content is part of the ethos Reddit has worked hard to project. "We power awesome communities," reads the graphic atop its "about" page.

But awesome communities for whom?

The 'Chimpire'

Along with countless others with entirely different interests, Reddit increasingly is providing a home for anti-black racists — and some of the most virulent and violent propaganda around. In November 2013, a hyper-racist subreddit called "GreatApes" was formed. Users posted epithet-strewn links to "news" stories of dubious origin that riffed on long established stereotypes about the black community. GreatApes was wildly popular and grew quickly, expanding into a much larger Reddit network called "the Chimpire," which was organized by a user known only by his or her posting name of "Jewish_NeoCon2."

"We feel it's time to expand our sphere of influence and lebensraum [the Nazi term for "living space"] on reddit. Thus we have decided to create 'the Chimpire,' a network of nigger related subreddits," Jewish_NeoCon2 wrote at the time. "Want to read people's experiences with niggers? There now is an affiliated subreddit for it. Want to watch chimp nature documentaries? We got it. Nigger hate facts? IT'S THERE. … Oh yes you bet we got videos of ghetto niggers fighting each other. Nigger drama on reddit? There's a sub. Sheboons? Gibsmedat."

Within a year, the Chimpire network had grown to include 46 active subreddits spanning an alarming range of racist topics, including "Teenapers," "ApeWrangling," "Detoilet," and "Chicongo," along with subreddits for both "TrayvonMartin" and "ferguson," each of them dealing with the controversial and highly publicized shooting deaths of unarmed black teenagers.

Then, last November, Reddit's most racist community evolved once again, adding the subreddit called CoonTown in the aftermath of a dispute between several top moderators at GreatApes. In just four days, CoonTown had reached 1,000 subscribers. And its popularity continues to grow.

According to Reddit Metrics, as of Jan. 6, there were 552,829 subreddits. CoonTown, with its 3,287 subscribers, ranked 6,279th, placing it in the top 2% of subreddits. It is the 680th fastest-growing subreddit on the site despite — or because of — violently racist material including a large number of threads dedicated to videos of black-on-black violence.

These gruesome videos show black men being hit in the head repeatedly with a hammer, burned alive, and killed in a variety of other ways. The subreddit's banner features a cartoon of a black man hanging, complete with a Klansman in the background. One fairly typical user, "Bustatruggalo" applauded the graphic violence as "[v]ery educational and entertaining." He or she continued on a separate thread: "I almost feel bad for letting an image like this fill me with an overwhelming amount of joy. Almost…."

Others, like user "natchil," were looking for still more. "Where is watchjewsdie?" this user wondered.

'Remember the Human'

There are some limits. "No calls for violence," the CoonTown subreddit's description reads. "It's prohibited by Reddit's site-wide rules."

Everything up to violence , however, is very much there, including the horrific content found on other Chimpire subreddits like "WatchNiggersDie" — content which is rarely, if ever, matched on forums like Stormfront and VNN, which worry about being shut down or driving off potential allies.

That's despite the Reddiquette section's first rule, which implores Reddit users to "Remember the human." "When you communicate online, all you see is a computer screen," it says. "When talking to someone you might want to ask yourself 'Would I say it to the person's face?' or 'Would I get jumped if I said this to a buddy?'"

If Reddit's rules seem relaxed, that's because they are meant to be. Still, although users are asked to "remember the human," there is little humanity in the way the subjects of subreddits like CoonTown are treated.

In June 2013, however, after an extended, public controversy, Reddit did ban the subreddit "Niggers" when large numbers of its denizens began overrunning another subreddit, "BlackGirls," with racist posts that were apparently not being policed by its moderators. "Brigading" — when large groups of people from one subreddit gang up to downvote comments on another subreddit that they don't normally visit — is prohibited by Reddit. Users of the Niggers subreddit also engaged in "vote manipulation," which falsely raises the popularity of a post by soliciting like-minded users to blindly upvote it. After repeated warnings and "shadow-banning," or making a user's posts invisible to everyone but the author, the subreddit was finally banned. According to Jewish_NeoCon2, more than a few former members of the Niggers subreddit have now taken up residence at CoonTown.

A Reluctance to Intervene

Condé Nast, one of the largest mass media companies in the United States, acquired Reddit in 2006, although the Internet company still operates independently. The stability of such a well-established and respected media firm, as well as the funding of many high-profile investors, including a $50 million investment from the rapper Snoop Lion this October, appears to guarantee Reddit's future.

A request for comment on the Chimpire was directed to Patricia Rockenwagner, a member of Condé Nast's public relations department, but she referred it to Victoria Taylor, Reddit's head of communications. Taylor did not respond to requests for comment.

Last year, however, Yishan Wong, Reddit's CEO, took to the subreddit "TheoryofReddit," to explain that Reddit was in the red. He revealed that in exchange for its relative operational independence from Condé Nast, the site was responsible for its own bills. The site's goal, according to Wong, is to pay its own way and its primary engine for accomplishing that is through ads, a premium subscription option, and the Reddit gift exchange.

Racist websites and organizations do sometimes benefit from racist subreddits like the Chimpire. That's because subreddit users often post links to other racist sites, and those links drive traffic to those other sites, which in turn typically sell merchandise in addition to pushing racist ideology and recruiting.

It's hard to dispute that Reddit does offer a venue for remarkably lively and unbridled conversation, and that dissident commentary that might not be tolerated elsewhere finds a welcome home there. Richard Spencer, a racist ideologue who heads the National Policy Institute, held an "AMA" (Ask Me Anything) session on Reddit last November, and although his views are widely regarded as loathsome, he was calm and understated in his discussion of far-right European politics. Unlike in WatchNiggersDie, there were no links to videos of brutal killings or other visual images meant to degrade the humanity of minorities.

Reddit is often hailed as one of the last bastions of truly free speech, and its owners' hesitance to jeopardize that status is understandable given the loyal following it has inspired. Reddit has removed content that has been illegally appropriated from commercial interests, such as the revelations that emerged from the November hack of Sony Pictures Entertainment.

The Internet is awash in racist, anti-Semitic, misogynistic and other hateful content, but much of it is relatively tame. Subreddits such the Chimpire offer a window on to just how awful some of the darkest corners of the Web really are.


Keegan Hankes is a Research Analyst at the Southern Poverty Law Center's Intelligence Project. The article originally appeared in the Spring 2015 issue of the Intelligence Report.

Illustration by Jim Cooke


Annyi szelfibotos quokkaszelfizőt láttam, hogy csak na

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Annyi szelfibotos quokkaszelfizőt láttam, hogy csak na

Dilis képek lepték el az internetet. Vigyorgó emberek szelfiznek rajtuk egy még náluk is jobban vigyorgó állattal. Véletlenül helyszíni riporttal tudunk szolgálni a dili és a vigyorgó állatok otthonából: az Indiai-óceáni Rottnest-szigetről.

Az állatot magyarul kurtafarkú kengurunak (Setonix brachyurus) hívják, de most még a magyar állatnevek nagy rajongójaként is inkább a nemzetközi nevét javaslom, mert sokkal viccesebb: quokka. Kis kenguruk, akkorák, mint egy kézitáska. Kis erszényükben ott a kicsinyük (ami így egy kis kis kenguru):

Annyi szelfibotos quokkaszelfizőt láttam, hogy csak na

Mintegy 14 ezer él belőlük a világon, egy-két kisebb populációt leszámítva szinte az összes a Rottnest-szigeten. Ez nem mindig volt így, régen egész Nyugat-Ausztráliában éltek, csak más endémikus ausztrál fajokhoz hasonlóan ők sem tudták felvenni a versenyt a gyorsabb és agresszívebb európai állatokkal. Szerencsére volt egy szigetük, ahol megmenekülhettek.

Annyi szelfibotos quokkaszelfizőt láttam, hogy csak na

Ezt csinálják:

  • aranyosan csámcsognak
  • aranyosan mászkálnak
  • aranyosan aranyoskodnak

Akcidentális riporterünk a varázslatos szigetek rutinos meglátogatója, Orosz Gábor, civilben az öcsém, aki épp a Nyugat-Ausztráliai Egyetemen vendégkutat. Az egyetem Perth-ben, a világ talán legizoláltabb nagyvárosában van, innen lehet komppal kimenni a nyílt óceánra, majd kikötni a Rottnest-szigeten, a quokkák otthonában. Gábor is ezt tette.

Annyi szelfibotos quokkaszelfizőt láttam, hogy csak na

A dilit a quokkák sajátos arckifejezése táplálja. Ha lehajolunk hozzájuk, pont úgy néznek ki, mintha betépve vigyorognának – nézzük csak végig a National Geographic pénteki összeállítását! Bár vadállatok, nem nehéz ilyen közel kerülni hozzájuk. Gábor azt írja, hogy szelfizni

nagyon könnyű velük, mert odajönnek maguktól és kb felmásznak rád, bemásznak a táskába, keresik a kaját. az étteremben ahol vacsoráztam, amikor mentem ki jött velem szembe kettő befele :D

Ha pedig találkozni szeretnénk a Földön élő teljes populáció egész számú százalékával, csak ki kell mennünk éjszaka, az állatok ugyanis főleg ilyenkor aktívak:

éjszaka kimentem tejutat nézni, és akkor jönnek elő főleg, több száz volt, utcákon, utakon, a teraszomon elképesztő volt, kicsit már ijesztő volt a koromsötétben menni éjszaka és mindenhol ott csámcsogtak

Az állatok (és Gábor) nappal is aktívak, amennyiben aktivitásnak lehet nevezni a henyélést az óceán partján:

Annyi szelfibotos quokkaszelfizőt láttam, hogy csak na

Ha azt várnánk, hogy sietősen ugrálnak, mint egy kenguru, várhatunk, a quokkák lusták:

probaltam levideozni amikor normalisan ugralnak mint a kenguruk, de azt csak akkor csinaljak amikor hosszabb tavon gyorsan kell menniuk, es mindig olyan hirtelen csinaltak hogy nem ment

Napok óta lényegében semmit nem csinálok, csak ezeket a képeket bámulom.

És hogy mi a teendő, ha szeretnénk egy quokkaszelfit, de sokalljuk a Rottnest-sziget Budapesttől légvonalban mért 13 ezer kilométeres távolságát? El kell menni az Állatkertbe, mert hála istennek itt is élnek quokkák! Én sajnos nem merek, mert annyira lehetetlenül aranyosak, hogy soha nem jönnék ki onnan.

Annyi szelfibotos quokkaszelfizőt láttam, hogy csak na

Fotók: Orosz Gábor (kivéve az elsőt, ami teensy88 munkája)

"Gets the Point Across": Reviews of Amazon's Top Confederate Flag

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"Gets the Point Across": Reviews of Amazon's Top Confederate Flag

If you happen to be looking to show your support for SAE, in the wake of its University of Oklahoma chapter getting booted off campus for being a bunch of racists, you might be in the market for the type of confederate flag seen hanging proudly in the SAE house at Oklahoma State University. Thankfully for you, Jeff Bezos invented Amazon.

A retailer named Rhode Island Novelty sells a product on Amazon called "Confederate Rebel Flag 3ft x 5ft Printed Polyester." It is the most popular confederate flag on Amazon and retails for $44.99, though if you are an Amazon Prime subscriber you can purchase it for just $4.89. Obtaining a lasting symbol of America's racism at an 89% discount is what internet retail dreams are made of.

(Amazon would also like you to know that you can buy "Confederate Rebel Flag 3ft x 5ft Printed Polyester" and "Dont Tread on Me Yellow [Gadsden] Flag - 3x5 foot Poly" and "U.S. Nylon US Flag 3X5 ft- Embroidered Stars" for a total price of just $18.21. Unfortunately, you have to procure horrible opinions about brown people on your own.)

237 Amazon users have felt strongly enough about "Confederate Rebel Flag 3ft x 5ft Printed Polyester" to leave a review and star rating. These are their stories.

5 stars

"With the current racial tension in this country"

"Gets the Point Across": Reviews of Amazon's Top Confederate Flag

"everyone wanted to say I was racist"

"Gets the Point Across": Reviews of Amazon's Top Confederate Flag

"How can you beat this deal?"

"Gets the Point Across": Reviews of Amazon's Top Confederate Flag

"this flag is the one"

"Gets the Point Across": Reviews of Amazon's Top Confederate Flag

"it really gets the point acrross"

"Gets the Point Across": Reviews of Amazon's Top Confederate Flag

"Perfect addition to the party"

"Gets the Point Across": Reviews of Amazon's Top Confederate Flag


"It hangs beside our American and Christian flags"

"Gets the Point Across": Reviews of Amazon's Top Confederate Flag

4 stars

"He's crazy about anything concerning the south"

"Gets the Point Across": Reviews of Amazon's Top Confederate Flag

"My neighbors were worried"

"Gets the Point Across": Reviews of Amazon's Top Confederate Flag

"i could have gotten my a$$ kicked"

"Gets the Point Across": Reviews of Amazon's Top Confederate Flag

"I paid for a $3.4 7confederate flag and I got one."

"Gets the Point Across": Reviews of Amazon's Top Confederate Flag

"im looking to get one made out of cotton"

"Gets the Point Across": Reviews of Amazon's Top Confederate Flag

"ok"

"Gets the Point Across": Reviews of Amazon's Top Confederate Flag

3 stars

"It wasn't has big as I thought"

"Gets the Point Across": Reviews of Amazon's Top Confederate Flag

"would order the heavier 'cotton' type next time"

"Gets the Point Across": Reviews of Amazon's Top Confederate Flag

"But I also have OCD"

"Gets the Point Across": Reviews of Amazon's Top Confederate Flag

2 stars

"This flag had to have been made north of Mason-Dixon"

"Gets the Point Across": Reviews of Amazon's Top Confederate Flag

"A customer who I'm building a gun case for"

"Gets the Point Across": Reviews of Amazon's Top Confederate Flag

1 star

"it tore in a week"

"Gets the Point Across": Reviews of Amazon's Top Confederate Flag

"I wanted a flag that could be flown"

"Gets the Point Across": Reviews of Amazon's Top Confederate Flag

"Can't help but wonder if positive reviews were fake"

"Gets the Point Across": Reviews of Amazon's Top Confederate Flag

"IM WAITING PATIENTLY"

"Gets the Point Across": Reviews of Amazon's Top Confederate Flag

Revenge Porn Dirtbag Plagiarizes Shark Tank Star

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Revenge Porn Dirtbag Plagiarizes Shark Tank Star

Every shitman deserves a second chance, right? Former revenge porn magnate Chance Trahan (that name!) is attempting to reinvent himself after his site, IsAnybodyDown, was shuttered. But he can't even start over again without exploiting someone else's life.

Daymond John, founder of FUBU and star of capitalist reality show Shark Tank, also offers his services as a motivational guest speaker for business audiences. Like anyone on a speaker circuit, he advertises his expertise along with certain provisions should he be hired. Chance Trahan, as if to say I'm still awful to the entire internet once again, is now claiming he's a "mentor" and "life coach"—and lifted John's speaking gig copy verbatim. Via TechDirt:

Revenge Porn Dirtbag Plagiarizes Shark Tank Star

On the left, a speaking topic from Daymond John's website. On the right, a speaking topic from Chance Trahan's website.

The whole thing is ripped off, right down to specifications for the AV setups. The only difference is that Daymond John is an actual entity in the business world, and there are people who would pay to hear him talk in numbers large enough to warrant an AV setup. Trahan, on the other hand, is a failed internet predator—though he's still asking $70,000 for a single speaking engagement. Why you would ever want to buy life coaching from a guy who made money selling stolen nudes and wears this suit, I do not know:

Revenge Porn Dirtbag Plagiarizes Shark Tank Star

After TechDirt pointed out Trahan's plagiarism, he posted this unhinged article on his personal blog, wherein he claims Daymond John is a mentor, and he has stolen from him with his blessing:

I respect Daymond John for taking me under his wing and showing me things that I never thought of before. Daymond has taught me a lot about being an entrepreneur, a fashion designer, a public speaker, and an all around genuinely great businessman. On top of all of that he has taught me how to become a better person for it. I thank him often and he actually replies. And for that I feel blessed that he would take a moment out of his busy and hectic life to thank me for acknowledging him.

Don't take his word for it; just look at all these satisfied stock photograph models on his website:

Revenge Porn Dirtbag Plagiarizes Shark Tank Star

Or consider this list of achievements, also copied and pasted from Daymond John's bio:

In recognition of his achievements, Chance has been the recipient of numerous awards; including:

The Crain's Business of NY "Forty Under Forty" Award

The Ernst & Young's "NY Entrepreneur of the Year" Award

The NAACP "Entrepreneurs of the Year" Award

The ESSENCE Achievement Award – the first ever to be given to a company

The BrandWeek "Marketer of the Year" Award

The Advertising Age Marketing 1000 Award for "Outstanding Ad Campaign"

This guy... I'm starting to think he's not a cool guy.

Police Officer Shoots and Kills Naked, Unarmed Black Man Near Atlanta

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Police Officer Shoots and Kills Naked, Unarmed Black Man Near Atlanta

A white police officer shot and killed an unarmed black man at an apartment complex in Chamblee, Ga. Monday afternoon. The man has been identified as 27-year-old Anthony Hill; he is believed to have suffered from mental illness.

Officers were called to the The Heights at Chamblee apartment complex, police told reporters, after Hill was reported "acting deranged, knocking on doors and crawling around naked."

When police arrived at the scene, Hill reportedly charged at an officer, who after stepping back and warning him to stop, opened fire, shooting Hill twice. Hill died at the scene.

DeKalb County Public Safety Director Cedrid Alexander told Fox Atlanta that it's "likely mental illness played some role in Hill's behavior."

Alexander also told the New York Times that the officer, who has since been placed on administrative leave, also had access to a Taser and pepper spray.

An investigation into the shooting has been launched by the Georgia Bureau of Investigations.

[Image via WSBTV]

Beautiful Women Allegedly Brawled Over Rihanna

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Beautiful Women Allegedly Brawled Over Rihanna

Models are just like us: tall, thin, difficult to approach because, like, what would you even say, and all in love with major recording artist, Rihanna. According to an anonymous source at Page Six, this love was enough to prompt a "catfight" between Cara Delevingne and Naomi Campbell.

At Paris Fashion Week (when will it end) on Sunday night, Campbell allegedly told Delevingne that she had heard the British babe disrespect their mutual close friend Rihanna, which was enough to spark a physical brawl between the two. No, these aren't lines from your horny dream journal—several witnesses, who could be total liars but still, told Page Six that this really happened:

The two models apparently got into a fight over their mutual friend Rihanna while at a chic party for Dasha Zhukova's Garage Magazine at Paris club Castel Sunday night.

A witness told Page Six, "Naomi accused Cara of 'disrespecting' Rihanna and started yelling, ­before Naomi pushed Cara, who pushed back." Another witness added, "Cara pulled Naomi's weave, but it didn't come off."

Not at Dasha Zhukova's Garage Magazine party! That seems really hard to believe. A whole magazine about garages? What a world.

But other witnesses claimed that some sources might be fibbing, insisting that there was a "messy pushing match," which was instigated by Campbell's alleged "ranting" at Cara. Delevingne supposedly responded by shouting "Get away from me!" to Campbell, leaving the two about fourfive seconds from wiling. But without the alleged weave-pulling.

A final batch of witnesses claimed that the club was packed and any pushing was a result of there not being enough space, and reports of catfighting were just glimmers of horny dreams. Campbell stood by this story on Twitter Tuesday morning, which Delevingne dutifully retweeted:

No matter which adventure you choose, where was Leo?

[Images via Getty]

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