In a piece that comes absurdly close in tone to Andy Borowitz's satirical "Scalia Furious He Has to Hear About Gay Couples All Week" post from yesterday, Mediaite's TV writer Joe Concha bitches at length about the amount of news coverage gay marriage (and people) have been taking up lately.
In "Supremely Tiresome: The Gay Marriage Issue Is Inescapable On TV, Radio, Facebook," Concha half-apologizes ("Here's a politically incorrect statement which roughly half of you will agree with and half will take issue") before coming out and stating his case: "I'm tired of hearing about gay marriage." How lucky he is to be able to take that position, since he is ostensibly straight and otherwise unaffected by the issues of a small, fringe group. Why do I have sit through so many tampon commercials? I don't even know how how to use the damn things!
...When you're just a small percent of the population (Gallup says 3.4 percent, while the Williams Institute, a think-tank devoted to LGBT research at UCLA, says four percent), why should the issue get such a lopsided amount of news coverage? After all, there are 30 million fantasy sports players who make up nearly ten percent of the country…you don't see them inundating television and social media with our passion, demanding more attention (and that's just a benign analogy, but it does make a point).
Fucking queers. Why can't they be more like...fantasy football enthusiasts?
To avoid all the gay shit, Concha, of course, can change the channel. He can focus on other stories. He can stick his fingers in his ears and go, "La la la la la," and wait for this thing to get sorted out. But something tells me that he's one of the people who needs this onslaught of coverage the most. Something isn't quite getting through.
Mediaite: "Supremely Tiresome: The Gay Marriage Issue Is Inescapable On TV, Radio, Facebook"
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