Evil Santa George R. R. Martin managed to stop killing beloved book characters long enough to make an appearance on last night's Conan.
But being removed from his Lair of Despair and General Jerkiness for an extended period of time weakens Martin, so Conan offered to revive the author by providing him with his sustenance of choice: The crushed souls of viewers reacting to this week's episode of Game of Thrones
With his dark heart fully rejuvenated, Martin offered a characteristically indifferent reaction to the infinite sadness of his fans.
By the way, if you're still upset over last Sunday's shocking turn of events, perhaps this alternate ending will be more to your liking (naturally, if you haven't watched the original ending, don't watch this one):