The Secret Service Almost Shot Iranian President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad in 2006
This could have been bad: According to an excerpt from Deep State: Inside the Government Secrecy Industry by Marc Ambinder and D.B. Grady, a Secret Service agent accidentally discharged his shotgun...
View ArticleTop Colorado Official Shot Dead Hours Before New Gun Acts Signed
Hours before Gov. John Hickenlooper, surrounded by family members of victims of shootings in Aurora and Littleton, signed a package of contentious gun control bills, Colorado's top prison official was...
View ArticleMayor of Major Florida City Arrested for DUI, Property Damage Following Car...
Gainesville mayor Craig Lowe was arrested early this morning by Florida Highway Patrol troopers after he was found asleep behind the wheel of a badly damaged Honda Civic near the scene of an accident....
View ArticleThis Illegally Made, Incredibly Mesmerizing Animated GIF Is What the Internet...
You are looking at, more or less, a portrait of the internet over an average 24 hours in 2012—higher usage in yellows and reds; lower in greens and blues—created by an anonymous researcher for the...
View ArticleCity Seeks Consultant to Figure Out How to Keep the Public Out of City Hall
The city of Saratoga Springs, New York has a problem: homelessness. I mean, the problem is not that Saratoga Springs residents are forced to sleep on the streets—the problem is these homeless citizens...
View ArticleRyan Gosling is Taking a Break from Acting to Focus on Just Being Ryan
Meticulously scruffy smirker Ryan Gosling has announced in an interview that he is taking brief professional hiatus from acting: "I've been doing it too much. I've lost perspective on what I'm doing....
View ArticleMy Strange Addiction Features Blood Drinker in Its Most Revolting Episode Ever
Last night's episode of My Strange Addiction was the show's fourth-season finale (I'm already mourning) and boy it was a doozy. The entire half hour was devoted to Michelle, a 29-year-old resident of...
View ArticleThe Sausage Double Beef Burger Is Yet Another Example of How This Century...
There's no use fighting it: The 21st century belongs to China. Exhibits A thru Z: The Sausage Double Beef Burger from McDonald's China. That's right, McDonald's. A company that's supposed to be as...
View ArticleThe KKK Attempts to Redeem Itself By Handing Out White-Bread Sandwiches at...
Last night, Discovery aired KKK: Beneath the Hood, a documentary that purported to offer previously unavailable access to various Ku Klux Klan chapters. Such unveiling feels like an act of desperation...
View ArticleWanted Man Arrested After Unwittingly Wearing T-Shirt with the Word 'Wanted'...
Police in Taiwan apprehended a man wanted on drug charges after he unwittingly wore a shirt that drew attention to the fact that he was a fugitive. According to a local police spokesman, the suspect,...
View Article'Ski More Cheaply,' and Other Real Money-Saving Advice From Bankers
In socialist Europe, where the hard work and financial innovation of bankers is not as appreciated as it is here, times are tough: bankers have just had their bonuses limited by law. How to deal with...
View ArticleThe New Roger Ailes Biography Manages to Go 35 Pages Before Credulously...
Fat dick Roger Ailes is the subject of a deeply, deeply terrible new biography by magazine writer Zev Chafets. You can gauge its value by the fact that Chafets saw fit to acknowledge his "debt" to Fox...
View ArticleFire All Meteorologists and Give Their Jobs to The KABOOYOW Lady
A freak hail storm passed over Brookshire, Texas, early yesterday morning, dumping thousands of stones, some as large as quarters. The damage to property was pretty extensive, but from the rubble rose...
View ArticleCIA's Tech Head on Your Data: 'We Try To Collect Everything And Hang On To It...
The man who introduced the CIA's Chief Technology Officer, Ira "Gus" Hunt, at yesterday's GigaOM Structure:Data conference in New York City thought it would be funny to quip, "If you don't give a big...
View ArticleSomeone Spent Over 800 Bucks On This Disturbing Cat Skin Rug
If you were hoping to pick up a cat-skin rug for your mancave through the Kiwi auction site Trade Me, it seems you're out of luck. The last one has just been sold to the highest bidder for NZ$955...
View ArticleMcDonald's Wraps Chicken in a Tortilla, Captivates America
In a move that is predicted to tip the balance of power in the entire U.S. fast food industry and spark an advertising war between top players that could cost hundreds of millions of dollars,...
View ArticleSize Does Matter to Woman Who Divorced Her Husband Over Irreconcilable Penis...
A woman in Taiwan recently divorced her husband, citing irreconcilable differences. Namely, the difference between what she expected his penis size to be, and what it ultimately was. The couple,...
View ArticleTexas Congressman: 'The Best Thing About the Earth Is if You Poke Holes in It...
What is the ultimate representation of the magnificence that is our complex, dynamic, and hugely mysterious planet Earth? Could it be something as simple as the laughter of children? Is it our...
View ArticleGuy Scratches Own Back, Finds Knife Blade Someone Stuck In There Three Years Ago
A Canadian man who finally got a good handle on an annoying itch he'd been scratching at for the past three years accidentally uncovered the source of irritation: A knife blade that got stuck in his...
View ArticleA Watermelon, a Golf Course, a Horse, and Monstrous Dogs: 12 New Paintings...
A watermelon, viewed from above, casts a greenish shadow on a white table. Two small figures on a putting green are spied from behind a distant tree. A horse with cow-like markings stands in field....
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