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Animal (Fuck Like A Beast): A Girls Recap
The title of this week's episode is "Boys," and focuses on sad-sack Ray, still ill-equipped for love and life, but with major supporting roles chipped in by Adam and Booth Jonathan. This is "Boys" and...
View ArticleHalf-Naked Ivy League Prof Opens Quantum Physics Course with 9/11 Footage,...
There is no (definitive) manual on How to Teach Quantum Physics, obviously, but one imagines that if such a manual existed it would likely recommend against opening your first lecture half-naked,...
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If You Go to College to Learn to Blog You Are a God Damn Sucker
So then, it's a new academic program straight outta Duke University: "Write(H)ers," which will, according to the Duke Chronicle, "create a community of feminist-oriented writers," by, you know,...
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Man with Down Syndrome Dies While in Police Custody; Medical Examiner Rules...
The death of a Maryland man with Down syndrome who was in police custody following his arrest inside a local movie theater has been ruled a homicide by the Baltimore County Medical Examiner's office....
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Unemployment Stories, Vol. 27: 'We Eat a Lot of Soup and Crackers'
The real unemployment rate in southwest Detroit is almost 50%. Seventeen rural South Carolina counties just closed their unemployment offices due to budget cuts, despite high unemployment. In New York,...
View ArticleHomophobic Subway Preacher Gets Verbally Destroyed by Gay Straphanger, Much...
This past Saturday, in a nondescript NYC subway car, something truly extraordinary took place. During yet another loud homophobic tirade by yet another obnoxious subway preacher, one straphanger who...
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Marco Rubio's PAC Made $119,000 Off His Awkward Water Sip
Marco Rubio's infamous and awkward sip of water was, as we predicted, the only thing anyone remembered from his State of the Union response. But as it turns out, Rubio's case of dry mouth made for...
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CBS News Anchor Rob Morrison Arrested for Allegedly Choking and Threatening...
Rob Morrison, an anchor for CBS 2 News' "This Morning" and "News at Noon," was arrested Sunday morning after he reportedly choked and threatened his wife, CBS MoneyWatch reporter Ashley Morrison, at...
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Jose Canseco Just Explained Gravity to the Internet
Do you have questions about gravity? Have you thought about why nothing REALLY big exists today in nature? Have you ever wondered how 30-foot leather birds were once able to fly? If so, today is your...
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Chinese Military Linked to Advanced Hacking Group That Tried to Bring Down...
The New York Times is reporting that members of China's most advanced hacking group have been traced to the same small neighborhood as a Chinese Army base, a revelation that all but confirms that the...
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Pistorius' Story: 'I Heard a Noise... I Felt a Sense of Terror... I Grabbed...
Paralympic champion and accused murderer Oscar Pistorius told a packed courtroom through a statement today that he "had no intention" of killing his girlfriend, the law student and model Reeva...
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Clive Davis Confirms Rumors, Comes Out as Bisexual
Legendary music mogul Clive Davis, whose impact on pop music and pop culture in general has been felt for the past five decades, reveals in his new memoir that he has been in a "strong monogamous...
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Economic Analysis Unfortunately Confirms Stereotypes About Art School
Making fun of going to art school as a futile and self-indulgent formula for regret is like... even more cliched than making fun of law school. Unfortunately, the latest economic data confirms that...
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Pizza Shop Gives Out Discount to Gun Owners Who Flash Their Weapon Inside Store
Flash a piece, get some cheap pizza. That's the motto of a pizza shop owner from Virginia Beach who recently started handing out discounts to gun owners, provided they bring their weapon into the...
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Multiple Dead After Man Goes on Shooting and Carjacking Spree Across Orange...
At least four people are dead after a man reportedly went on a 25-minute shooting spree this morning in and around the Southern California cities of Tustin and Villa Park. The suspected shooter is...
View ArticleGuys Buy Their Partners Disturbing Valentine's Day Gifts Because Jimmy Kimmel...
For most men, Valentine's Day offers an invaluable opportunity to cram a year's worth of romance into a single slate-cleaning night. For Jimmy Kimmel, however, Valentine's Day is just another chance...
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The Secret to Long Life: Garlic, Onions, Rotten Eggs
Want to live longer? Pathetic. Your slavish determination to cling to mortality at all costs marks you as a weak and sickening little character. Anyhow—have we got a long life secret for YOU! Stank...
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NASA Has Lost Communication Capabilities with the International Space Station...
According to a NASA press release, the space program governing body lost communication with the International Space Station this morning around 9:45 AM EST. While the situation sounds frightening,...
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Kate Middleton Looks Pregnant As Hell
Lady with a baby inside her Kate Middleton officially debuted the rounded abdominal area of a gestating female, caused by the rapid growth and development of a tiny cluster of cells into a sassy baby...
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BBC Apologizes for Playing 'Hey Joe' Right After Report on Oscar Pistorius
The BBC was forced to issue a formal apology today on behalf of one of its radio stations — BBC Radio 6 Music — after it played the Jimi Hendrix song "Hey Joe" immediately following a news report on...
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